Love Me Till The End
by Sageeee
Summary: Lucy heartfilia was bullied most through elementary school. Leaving her broken and torn. When she enters highschool she hopes to leave it all in the past and start fresh. But a guy from her past makes it hard doing so.
1. The beginning

Lucy heartfilia was now in grade 5.

But it was her own personal hell to her.

" _bitch"_

" _whore_ "

" _freak_ "

They called her that daily.

Lucy silently walked down the hall trying not to hear everyone whisper. She could feel the cold dead stares of hatred from everyone.

She walked slowly into the bathroom. Entered a bathroom stall. And let the tears flow.

She started crying hard. She heard the door open and close with the sound of foot steps close by.

"Is someone crying?"

They stood silent for a second. Lucy sniffled and they started laughing.

"They must be a loser for crying at school"

The girls laughed and continued making fun of Lucy, not knowing it was her.

She lifted her feet up so they wouldn't recognize her shoes. If they did they'd tell everyone a heartfilia was crying at school

She held her breath as they left. She wiped her nose and face and went out to go look in the mirror.

Her cheeks were red. Her eyes would puff out later on. But at least for now they didn't.

The Bell rang. Lucy's heart sunk as she realised what subject was next.

Gym.

Lucy hated it. That's when everyone targeted her. She didn't know why they bullied her. But it was non stop ever since she came here.

She walked into the hallway and ran all the way to gym. Lucy liked getting dressed and hiding in the storage closet.

She'd hide in the locker room but they found her there before.

Lucy was always the girl who'd walk alone in the hallways. And eat lunch alone. She was always that girl.

All because she was wealthy.

Lucy sat in closet in the gym. She could tell they started now. Everyone was shouting and laughing. A ball would smack by the wall beside the storage every now and then.

"Erza, could you go grab some more dodge balls in the storage? Here's the key" the gym coach asked the red haired girl as she nodded and grabbed the key.

Lucy hugged her self. Trying to be silent.

Erza put the key on place, but the storage was already open. She pushed the door. All she seen was a head of blonde hair.

She looked down at Lucy. Lucy started onto the girls brown orbs. "What are you doing here?" Erza asked her.

Lucy stayed quiet. Erza began to recognize her. Erza quickly grabbed an armful of dodge balls like she was asked to and shut the door silently.

Erza knew who she was. She was the rich kid who is bullied everyday.

People said Lucy's dad was only rich because he was a good liar. Or how Lucy's mother was a 'prostitute'.

They said Lucy didn't deserve her wealth.

Erza knew the truth. But she never said a word.

Lucy heard the class go on. 15 minutes passed and the gym coach didn't come to get Lucy an make her play.

Lucy sighed in relief.

…

Lucy started walking home at the end of the day. She rubbed her eyes a bit so they wouldn't seem so red.

Erza exited the school and also started walking home. When she spotted the girl she ran towards her, she had no control.

Erza stopped as she walked towards the girl. Something in her gut made her want to know her.

"Hey, you're Lucy right?"

Lucy turned and looked at the stranger. The girl from gym.

"…yeah"

"I'm..erza" erza reached her hand out to Lucy. Lucy ignored it and kept on walking. Leaving erza confused.

Erza watched Lucy go around the corner and disappear from her sight before she started walking home also.

Lucy reached the corner of the street were she would be getting picked up. The black car pulled up, the window rolled down and Capricorn peeked out.

She smiled and got in the car.

"How was school today ms. Lucy?"

"..good.."

He nodded and started driving back to the heartfilia resident. Lucy stayed silent the whole way there and stared out the window.

Lucy made sure Capricorn didn't notice her puffy eyes from earlier today.

Lucy finally got home. She jumped onto her bed and grabbed a pillow. She hugged it tight as she thought about that erza girl.

Someone actually talked to her, with out insulting her. It made her gut feel weird.

She smiled.

…

Lucy ran to school as she slammed the car door. It was pouring rain today. A storm came in the night. It wouldn't stop until late evening.

Once Lucy got inside she was soaking wet. So was everyone else except for the people who rode in a car.

"Looks like the bitch is wet"

Oh no.

"I bet its the first time she's washed"

They laughed as the pointed at Lucy. Lucy noticed one of the girls was also wet. But she bit her tongue.

Erza walked towards lucy and grabbed her wrist. "Lucy I need you to come with me for a sec." Lucy walked as erza pulled her away.

The girls stopped laughing and stopped to stare at the. As they disappeared into the class room.

"What is it?" Lucy asked once they were alone. Erza went silent, but she smiled and waved it off. "Never mind. It's nothing" she walked out of the classroom and into the hallway.

Lucy walked into science. When she opened the door a bucket of red liquid was poured onto her. But it wasn't blood.

"Ha-ha!"

"Ew what is that? She smells"

"She deserves it!"

The class laughed. Lucy just stood there in shock. A teacher came into class and told her to go to the principle's office.

Lucy had to stay like that all day since she didn't have her gym clothes with her. They didn't let her call her parents or home to get a change of clothes.

When it was time to leave Lucy went to the playground. And sat on a swing and let the rain get her wet.

Some of it washed off, but bits were still sticking in her hair and her shirt.

Lucy stared into the sky and closed her eyes. She let the rain pour into her. She didn't care anymore. About anyone or anything. Especially herself.

Lucy couldn't tell of she was crying or not. But she decided she was.

"Lucy?"

She turned her head sightly. Erza stood with an umbrella. The face of sadness took over erza's face.

"It's funny isn't it?"

Erza just stared at her. She could see anger mixed with pain in her eyes.

"I can't even tell if I'm crying. Or how everyone hates me because its funny. All of it is funny isn't it?"

"No Lucy it isn't"

"Then why is everyone laughing?"

Erza ran towards her and hugged her. Lucy cried into her shoulder. She barely knew her, but she felt safe.

"I'm never going to let you be hurt anymore Lucy."

"How? We aren't even friends."

"I am now Lucy. I'm your friend"

Lucy felt something in her gut. It was good feeling. She cried even more harder, erza hugged her even tighter. Lucy didn't care she couldn't breath. Because she was safe now.

Lucy felt different.

 _she felt accepted._

…

See? I told you I'd be posting new stories. But yeah this one is short. I'm still getting into the process of erza and Lucy becoming friends. I should be posting tomorrow or Friday.

But in the mean time eenjoy!

Please review


	2. Friend ship

It's been a month now. Nothing has changed since erza and Lucy became friends. But lucy and erza were closer now, more than ever.

Erza always stuck up for Lucy. But like the others would ever change. So lucy acted as if nothing changed.

Lucy changed quickly in the locker room. And hid in the storage room before everyone came flooding in.

Lucy sat in the storage room again. It was gym, she made sure to close the door when she came in so no one would come in. Luckily it opens from the inside.

Lucy hugged her legs as she waited till class ended. She thought she would be alone the entire time. But it came to an end when the doorknob was moving.

She held her breath. She'd be in trouble if she was discovered. She heard a small knocking, as if someone knew she was in here.

Realizing who it was Lucy slowly got up and twisted the door handle. Erza peeked in. "Mind if I come in?" Lucy opened the door and let her in. Making sure no one else seen.

Lucy sat her self on the floor again, the same spot before she got up. Erza sat next to her. They sat in a comfortable silence.

"Why are you in here? I thought you liked sports" Lucy said. Erza breathed in. "Because I'd knew you'd be alone in here. And I am your friend so I can't just leave you in here"

Lucy smiled. She actually decided to miss gym and hang out with Lucy. Lucy felt something warm in her chest.

"So. What do you usually do in here?" Erza asked. Lucy looked at her "nothing. Just sit here mostly" erza looked back at her.

"That's fine with me" erza yawned and leaned back. She closed her eyes. Lucy stared in amazement.

For that entire time in gym. They sat together, accompanying one another, never saying a word. In comfortable silence they enjoyed each others company.

When Lucy went back to change, her clothes were gone. She panicked. Her and erza searched everywhere for them. Lucy's heart sank when she realized the only place they didn't check.

The bathroom.

They check all the stalls. Lucy found them in the third last stall. Lucy's clothes were soaking wet in the toilet. Someone tried flushing them down the toilet.

Lucy had to go around in her gym clothes the rest of the day.

…

Lucy walked down the halls the next day. She stopped in front of her locker. She put the code in and opened the locker door.

She was greeted with papers flying out and her locker spray painted. A huge red X was now her locker door.

" _ugly white trash"_

 _"You know you don't belong here"_

 _"Just leave already"_

 _"Ugly blonde. I bet your hair is bleached"_

 _"Filth"_

Lucy picked up the papers after reading them. She hurried more and more as people started snickering. A hand came in and helped her pick up everything.

Erza grabbed Lucy's pile and threw them out. Not caring what the kind of papers they were. Lucy grabbed her text books and slammed her door.

The person who did it was obvious so they didn't bother telling on them or anything of the sort.

Lucy just headed to class. Erza said a few words to Lucy before they separated, but lucy didn't hear. She was blanked out at the moment, thinking.

Lucy just wanted this to end. All of it.

Lucy and erza walked together until they separated. When they separated they said their good byes. Once Lucy went around the corner. Erza clutched her fist and walked back towards school.

Anger rushed through out her. There was a black aura as she walked. People cleared a path where ever she went.

When she found the people responsible, she didn't hold back.

Erza grabbed one of the girls by the collar and threw her to the ground. The girls immediately started panicking.

"Why the hell are you guys after her so much?!" She shouted. "What?" The girl questioned. That made erza's blood boil, how they questioned her.

"Leave Lucy alone." She said calmly. Trying to hold in her anger.

"Or what" spiteful, the girl smiled as she got up. Erza punched her in the face, knocking her to the ground once more.

Erza didn't give it her all so she wasn't hurt that bad. But she did get a bloody nose.

"If you guys ever go after her again I swear I'll do even worse"

Erza wanted to do so much more to them. But she figured it was enough to scare them. She turned on her heel and walked home. Not looking back.

Erza prayed they would leave her alone now. She seen what they did to her when Lucy first came to the school.

She knew what lucy has went through.

It seemed like they were holding back, waiting for something bigger. Erza could tell the locker scene was a warning of some sort.

Erza was praying for it not to happen. Whatever they were planning.

…

It was the weekend now. It seemed like paradise when ever it was the weekend. Away from school. The only downside was that she wouldn't be able to see erza.

Lucy wondered the halls of her house. It sucked this weekend because her father was gone for a business trip.

Ever since Lucy's mother died of an illness. It was lonely. She hated her school. It sickened her how her school called her mother a 'prostitute'. And everyone actually believed it.

Lucy's mother was doctor. It was a shock when we found out she was sick.

Her school practically shunned Lucy away. All because they were jealous of her wealth. Lucy went into her room.

 _"Hey your that heartfilia kid right?"_

" _yeah, why?"_

" _Nothing.."_

" _Hey did you want to be best friends?"_

 _"I am!"_

 _"I'm her best friend!"_

Everyone wanted to be Lucy's friend in the beginning. When they found out she was a heartfilia they all came bothering her. But in the end they tried using her.

Lucy isn't the dumb blonde everyone thinks. She seen straight through them. What they were all really like. Maybe that's why nobody liked her, and shunned her.

" _I'm sorry, I...can't be neither of your guys best friend"_

 _"why not?"_

 _"I don't really know you guys..."_

" _oh.."_

Lucy yawned and plopped onto her bed. Her eyes felt heavy and her body ached. She went under the blanket. Once she was warm she closed her eyes.

A thick inky darkness flooded her sight.

.

" _Nobody likes you Lucy"_

She was in a dark room all by herself. She looked everywhere for the source of the voice. Or a way out.

Soon she heard everyone laughing.

" _You're just a spoiled rich kid"_

People surrounded her. They started pointing at her. She felt weak in the knees, from all the attention. They started laughing.

 _"Just the sight of you digust me"_

Lucy fell on her knees. She felt scared. Millions of faces surrounded her. They all laughed and pointed at her.

" _You're a selfish person"_

Someone threw an egg at her hair. It was exploded within impact.

" _Selfish!"_

Another one came, soon a dozen more. Lucy started crying and hugging her self. "Please don't!" She pleaded. Her hair and everywhere else was covered with raw eggs.

Lucy cried and cried. She looked up and her vision blurred.

.

She jumped up in her bed. Everything went silent. She was in her room again. The sun shined in from the window. There was no dark room, or eggs in be hair.

Lucy was still in her clothes from yesterday. She looked at the time, it was 12.

There was a knock at the door.

"Miss Lucy? There's someone here for you at the door"

She rubbed her eyes and opened the door. Virgo was standing there. "Shall I go get-" Lucy cut her off "I can go get it my self Virgo. But thanks"

She walked to the front door. She grabbed the handle and breathed in.

Lucy opened the front door. Erza was standing there, clutching her bag.

"Erza?" Erza looked relieved when she seen lucy. She hugged Lucy, tighter than that time at the swig set.

"H-hi?"

…


	3. Crying at a school

**Lucy pov**

When erza was at my door step I didn't know what to do. Even when she hugged me she surprised me. I will always remember that time. That was the first time I ever had a friend come over.

She came in, visited and left. She just wanted to make sure I was okay. She was so surprised at how big my house was compared to hers.

I was supposed to go to her house on Sunday. She wanted me to meet her boyfriend jellal.

"You have a boyfriend?!" I spout out. She laughed and wiped the tears from her eyes. When she stopped laughing she nodded her head.

"Yeah.. His names jellal. He's been wanting to meet you ever since I told him about you."

I remember feeling that warm feeling again. I smiled. "He's actually grateful for you.. You sort of helped me in some sort of way. I was dealing with something my own.." she trailed on.

"Well I don't know what kind of impression I'll leave on him but.. I'll try." Erza looked at Lucy, stunned. Her eyes glowed with pure happiness.

"Thanks Lucy." Lucy nodded and smiled at her. Erza looked at her lap.

I sat in a tub full of hot water. I stared down at my reflection. The dark circles under my eyes sort of faded away. But not completely. I sighed and closed my eyes.

Tomorrow was Sunday I realized. She told me where her house is. So it shouldn't be hard. But I held my chest. I could feel the anxiety already.

I kept thinking of what if. It ran through my mind on repeat. I held my breath and went under the water and came back up again.

If erza needs me then I'll be there for her. She has been there for me all this time, now it's my turn.

Besides, he's the one wanting to meet me. I should be happy. Nobody ever wanted to meet me besides family.

I felt happy just thinking about it.

I got out of the tub and went straight to bed.

…

I knocked on the door. Erza opened it. She smiled and greeted me. I greeted back and smiled. "Come in Lucy. No need to be shy" I smiled and walked in. She shut the door behind me.

Erza's home wasn't to small. It was big actually. It had 3 floors.

"Hello, you must Lucy right?" I heard someone say. I turned to see a guy with blue hair sitting on the couch. He had a red tattoo on his eye. He smiled kindly and told me to sit down.

I sat across from him. "I heard alot from erza about you" he smiled again. "Same with you" I replied.

"I've been meaning to thank you actually" jellal said as erza left the room. "Erza..hasn't been herself lately. Until just recently." I listened to him trail on.

"But since she met you..she's-"

"I know.. But she helped me too. So in some sort of way we helped each other" I smiled. I could tell he was staring at me. But when I opened my eyes he had a warm smile. The one that erza gives whenever we talk or she tries to cheer me up.

"So..do you like writing?"

"Bye erza!"

"Bye Lucy, I'll see you tomorrow!"

"It was nice to meet you Lucy!"

"You too jellal, bye guys"

I waved as I started walking home. It was getting dark out now. Yet it was only 7.

We had fun, I actually made a friend. I know it sounds lame but I'm proud of myself. Jellal seemed nice. I could tell by the way he looks at erza he loves her.

I smiled as I was walking.

Once I reached home, I was tired. So I changed into pajamas and went to sleep right away.

I didnt have any nightmares that night.

…

I sat in the classroom. I looked at the seat to my left, it was empty. I was always in class early. So when the Bell rang everyone came flooding in.

Class started and he said a few words. I didn't bother listening. He pointed at the door and a guy walked in.

I was blanking out at the moment. Day dreaming. And looking out the window. So I didn't pay attention to him when he sat next to me.

At the end of class I left and went to my locker. I opened it and another pile of papers came flying out again, in every direction.

It was all the horrible writing again. But twice as deadly.

I picked them up and threw them away. I could hear those girls laughing at me again.

I don't know why but it started wearing me down. I stood by the garbage. And held my breath as I started walking.

I started tearing up so I ran. I ran as fast as I could to the farthest place possible. It was lunch anyway.

I went outside and sat on the side of the building. I couldn't stop the tears, I felt them flowing and rolling down my cheeks.

I started to cry. I sobbed into my sleeves. I tried stopping since I knew my face would puff up if I cried any more.

"Hey? Are you crying?" I heard. My heart sunk. Someone caught me. "You shouldn't be crying at school. Nor crying at all" someone stood in front of me.

I looked up to see a guy with pink hair and a scarf. He was looking down at me. He lend a hand towards me.

"Don't cry."

I looked away. And wiped my eyes. "It's okay.. Really." I said and got back up. I dusted my self off and rubbed my eyes.

"No its not."

I stood there frozen. "If it were you wouldn't be crying" I sighed. "It's not my fault.." I said and looked to the side. He smiled and held his hand in front of me.

"I'm natsu dragneel." He said and gave me a toothy grin. I grabbed it and shook his hand slowly. "I'm..Lucy heartfilia" he kept smiling.

I let go and started walking back. He looked at me strangley. "Is that it?" He asked me. I was about to say something but I stopped walking.

I heard panting and someone stop in front of me. It was erza. She looked like she was panicked. She breathed out in relief when she seen me.

"where were you?" She grabbed my shoulders. She started breathing in hard. She looked over my shoulders.

"Natsu?"

I looked back. The 'natsu' guys face brightened up. "Erza!" He ran towards us. He hugged erza. She hit him in the head.

"Idiot!"

"Ow! What the-" she started barking at him. "You should've told me you were with Lucy! I've been searching everywhere for her!"

"Yeah its nice to see you too"

I laughed at them. They looked at me as if I were from a different planet. I kept on laughing. "What's so funny?" He asked me.

"Nothing" I said and wiped my eyes. Erza smiled at me. "So I see you've met." I nodded as natsu did too. "Yeah we did. But she was crying just now" I gave him a look.

"You were crying again?" She asked me. I sighed. Natsu looked at me again. But I looked away.

"Yeah.." Erza sighed. "What did they do now?" She asked me. "They?" Natsu interrupted. But we ignored him. "Same thing. They put those notes in my locker again"

She clutched her fist. She turned and stomped away. I panicked and grabbed her shoulders. "Don't erza you'll make it worse!"

"I warned them already! Obviously they didn't get the memo. So I'm going to go and give it back!"

I hugged erza from behind to stop her. She stopped struggling and sighed.

"Who are 'they'?"

We turned and looked at natsu. He looked confused. We looked at each other. "Lucy's-" I cut off erza. "Nobody." I said.

He nodded and smiled. "I have to go back inside guys. Sorry, I just came out here to come find Lucy" she smiled and went inside. She waved before she shut the door.

A silence grew around us.

"So.. Besides crying. What else do you like to do?"

…

Well now Lucy finally met natsu. I was going to make them meet in highschool. But scratch that idea.

Please enjoy and review!

Enj


	4. Natsu & lucy

**Lucy pov**

Natsu keeps bothering me. But it doesn't seem to annoy me for some reason.

I thought I would've got a break from him when I went to class the next day. When I sat down I heard the Bell rang as usual.

I seen everyone come flooding in as usual. But I noticed someone in the crowd who differed from everyone else. He smiled and waved at me, and sat in the desk next to me.

Natsu dragneel.

"Hey Luce" he said and looked at me. "..l-luce?" I stuttered. "Yeah. It's a nickname I came up for you" he smiled again. "A Nick name?" I asked again. He nodded.

"Yeah, Luce"

"Thanks?"

"No problem" he smirked as he leaned back into his chair. As he closed his eyes waiting for class to start.

The teacher came walking in and took a sip of coffee. He set the papers down and opened his textbook.

"Okay class. Turn to page 200…"

I sat with erza at lunch. Outside at one of the tables. "Hey guys" natsu said and sat down. He set down what looked like a pound of food. He acted as if it was nothing and started scarfing it down.

Erza continued eating. But I stared in amazement as natsu ate everything in a flash. I looked at my lunch. And started eating again.

Once we were done I went back inside. It was gym after this class. I could feel my gut turn as my anxiety kept getting worse and worse.

Once the Bell rang I ran to the locker room. Changed and went into the gym. The boys were already done changing. They were already playing volleyball.

I walked to the storage room. The sound of the whistle blew. I froze in my spot. "Lucy! Start warming up and get on a team"

I felt my gut turn in the worst way. I walked back. And sat on the bench waiting for everyone else.

"Lucy! Come play with me" I heard natsu shout. He waved as he held the ball in his arm. He ran towards me when I didnt bother getting up.

"Come on" he grabbed my arm and dragged me to the spot where he was. We were about to play before the whistle blew once more.

"Alright. Everyone on teams?"

We started playing. I was on natsu's side. The other girls were on the other side. I could already see the mischief in their eyes.

I gulped and got into stance. Someone served and the ball went flying to the other side. Some one hit it and it was near the net the girl spiked it.

I seen the ball coming towards my face. I froze. Once it was near I snapped out of it and hit it. It went forward. It kept going from side to side as everyone started playing again.

The girl frowned at me. She tried hitting the ball in my face. "Luce you okay?" Natsu asked me. I nodded and continued playing.

At the end of gym I was sweating. The coach made everyone take showers. I grabbed my towel. And turned on the hot water. I felt relieved. And clean.

I got out and went back to my locker. My clothes were gone again. Just my underwear and bra were left since I hid them deep in my bag.

I told erza. "I would give you my clothes but they're sweaty.." She said "I'll take them!" I said without hesitation. She handed me them and I changed into them. They weren't sweaty as erza said.

They smelt of strawberries actually.

I walked out. And everyone started snickering at me and giggling. I looked into the garbage. My clothes were stuffed in there with garbage on top of them.

 _"looks like she has a thing for gym clothes"_

I sighed and went to my locker. I grabbed everything I needed for class.

I waited for the day to end as I sat in class.

…

"Achoo!" I sneezed. I opened the door and exited the school. My hair was still wet and it was cold out.

"Here" natsu said and threw a peice of clothing on me. It smelt like cologne. "What is this?" He walked in front of me. "My sweater. Wear it" I blushed and grabbed it off head.

"I can't natsu this is yours" he smiled and closed his eyes. "I don't know what happened to yours since your wearing your gym clothes."

"Erza's."

"But you'll catch a cold if you don't"

I sighed and put it on. Natsu zipped it up for me. "I'm not a kid you know" he laughed. "Of course not".

I started walking home. Natsu walked behind me as I kept walking. Natsu kept following me. I walked faster until I couldn't hold it any longer.

"Are you stalking me?" I said bluntly, surprising him. He stopped and looked at me with a blank stare. As if I were stupid.

"I live around here" he said. I blushed from embarrassment. "I- I'm sorry!" I said and walked faster. I felt my face turning more red and red.

"Wait Luce!" He shouted. "Let me walk you home" he said as he grabbed my arm. He looked at me. I was still blushing. He looked away when he seen it.

We got to the corner. The car wasn't there yet. But Capricorn said he'd be late. So I'd have to wait a bit longer.

"What are you waiting for?"

"My car"

He stopped and stood beside me. "Can I wait with you until then?" I looked at him. "Sure?" He smiled and stood beside me. I clutched my bag.

"So..what happened to your clothes."

"Some girls threw them in the garbage when I was in the shower."

He stared at me. "That's bad! Who did it?!" I sighed. And looked at him. His onyx orbs staring into mine waiting for an answer.

"Lissana Strauss"

…

"Lissana?"

"Yeah..she's hates me for some reason."

I looked away from his eyes. "I know lissana actually" My gut turned again. "What?" I said. He breathed in the cool air.

"Yeah..since we were kids"

"Wait I thought you were new here" he shook his head. "New to this school yeah" he pointed. "But I lived here for as long as I can remember."

"Oh.."

"Why does lissana hate you?" He asked me. I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know.. But maybe since I'm rich."

He gasped at the last word. "RICH?!" he shouted.

"Shh!" I said and covered his mouth. "Yes sadly. I am.. Don't you know jude heartfilia?" He nodded. "He's my dad." His eyes widened.

I removed my hands. He stared at me. "I thought you were one of those people who'd try and use me.." I said. He shook his head again.

"No I'd never do that. But if I was trying to use you why are you still friends with me?"

I..didn't know either. I stayed quiet. "I don't know either actually… I usually push people away who do so"

"Well Luce. You don't have to push me away."

I smiled. I seen the car pulling up. It parked in front of me. Capricorn rolled down the window and peeked out as usual.

"I'm sorry miss Lucy. I was busy driving your father around all day"

"It's fine Capricorn." I opened the door. I was about to get in when I looked at natsu's sweater.

I took it off. I handed it to natsu"

"Here's your sweater. Thanks for letting me use it" I said. He pushed it away. "Have it" he said and smiled as he tilted his head.

I smiled and got in the car. I looked out the window. "I'll see you tomorrow natsu!"

He waved as we drove Into the distance. I looked in the mirror until natsu disappeared, he was still standing there watching us drive off.

I smiled.

…

Oh god. Two chapters in one night. I need sleep.

Please review and enjoy!


	5. Natsu dragneel

**Natsu pov**

I woke up this morning. Dreading going to school. I was forever transferring school to school. It was the same story every time, I become the loner who's also the new kid. People would try and become friends but leave eventually.

I got up, showered and got dressed and headed to school. I noticed a blonde girl walking in front of me. But she didn't notice me so I ignored her.

I got to school. When I got to class I introduced my self like every other time. "Natsu, there's a seat by Lucy over there. Go and have a seat" the teacher said as he pointed at the blonde girl.

I sat down and looked at her. But she kept staring out the window. I sighed and looked forward. And began writing and doodling on the front of my book.

When it was lunch I figured I would go and sit somewhere. Just to get away from the crowd. It was always the first day I needed to get away.

I found a spot on the side of the building. I sat down and breathed in the fresh air. Nobody was walking around here so it was pretty quiet.

That's when I met her.

The blonde girl came running and stood by the wall a few feet away. She was crying. She slowly sat down and continued crying. She tried covering her mouth to stop. But failed.

She didn't seem to be noticing me again. But before I knew it I was standing up and walking towards her. "Hey. Are you crying?" She paused. She looked at me.

"You shouldn't be crying at school. Nor crying at all" I said and gave her my hand to get up. "Don't cry" I said. But she ignored my hand and rubbed her eyes.

"Its okay… really" She stood up and dusted her self off.

Her eyes were a dark brown. And they always seemed to trail off somewhere else. Never looking anyone in the eyes. Her eyes didn't puff out from crying. But I bet they will later on.

"No its not"

She looked surprised. She stiffened. "If I were you I wouldn't be crying" I said. She sighed. "It's not my fault.."

Again her eyes trailed off somewhere.

"I'm natsu dragneel" I introduced myself. I held my hand in front of her again. I started smiling. She grabbed my hand, her hands were soft. And slowly shook my hand.

"I'm..lucy heartfilia."

She let go and started walking back inside. Leaving me behind. "Is..that it?" I asked. I was expecting more of a conversation.

She opened her mouth and was about to say something. But she stopped when he heard foot steps and heavy breathing.

Erza came and looked at Lucy. Relief showed on her face.

But I was surprised. It was erza. I've known her for as long as I could remember. But she didn't look at me.

"Where were you?" She asked Lucy. Grabbing a hold of her shoulders. Then she looked over her shoulders and paid attention to me.

"Natsu?"

I was filled with joy. I ran towards her. "Erza!" I started hugging her. It was a happy moment before she hit me in the head.

"Ow what the-" she started yelling at me. "Idiot!" She said and looked at me.

"Why didn't you tell me you were with Lucy?! I've been. Searching for her everywhere!" She yelled in my face.

"Yeah nice to see you too."

Lucy started laughing. It surprised me, and erza it seemed like. Erza stopped and looked at her. "What's so funny?" She wiped the tears in her eyes from laughing.

"Nothing …"

Erza smiled at the two of us.

"I see you two met"

…

Erza and Lucy started arguing. All I said was that Lucy was crying just now. I couldn't reallly understand them. But I always heard "they" or "them" when they were arguing.

"They?" I asked. They stopped and looked at me. Then they looked at each other. Erza sighed "Lucy's-" she got out before Lucy cut her off.

"Nobody." She stated.

The next day in gym. I got ready and stare playing volleyball with the other guys. I seen lucy come out and she started walking towards the storage room.

She got caught and sat on the bench. Again without knowing myself I was calling her to come and play. And I even went after her and dragged her to where I was standing.

But she didn't seem to mind either. So I continued playing with her. But we got interrupted when the whistle blew.

We stared forming teams and started playing. I noticed the other side had a lot of girls. And when the ball came over the net. I seen one of them trying to spike it in Lucy's face.

I went into a panic. But Lucy hit the ball and sent it forward. I sighed in relief. "Luce you okay?" I asked her. She nodded and continued playing.

I decided to hang around with Lucy and erza. Since well..I have no one else to hang around. I tried talking to Lucy but she'd only nod her head or say something in quiet voice.

After gym Lucy came walking out with her gym clothes on. And here blonde hair was wet. People laughed and gossiped in whispers about her.

Lucy just grabbed her stuff and headed into class.

After school I walked out. "Achoo!" I heard someone sneeze. I looked to my left and Lucy was standing there. It was cold out since it was fall.

She wiped her nose and continued walking. I grabbed whatever I had on and gave it to Lucy. I threw it on her head. "Here" I said as she took it off her head.

"What is this?" I smiled. "My sweater. Wear it" her eyes widened and she blushed.

"I can't natsu this is yours" I smiled and closed my eyes. "I don't know what happened to yours since your wearing your gym clothes." I said.

"Erza's"

"But you'll catch a cold if you don't" she put on the sweater and looked at it. I leaned in and zippered it up for her. She smiled. "I'm not a kid you know" I laughed.

"Of course not"

I began walking home. Lucy was walking in front of me. But I chose to ignore it. I continued and looked up at the sky. Thinking of the colors and and such.

Suddenly she came to a halt. I almost bumped into her if I didn't look again. "Are you stalking me?" She blurted. I stared at her blankly. "I live around here" she blushed.

"I- I'm sorry!" She said and walked faster. "Wait Luce!" I shouted and grabbed a hold of her arm before she ran away. "Let me walk you home" she looked at me. Her face was a burning red.

I looked away so she wouldn't think I was staring.

We were walking and sort of charting until she stopped at a corner. I was silent for a moment before I asked her. "Wait are we waiting for?" I said. "My car" she said and breathed out.

"Oh…" I said and smiled. I stood beside her as she looked down the street. And stood beside me again.

"So..what happened to your clothes?"

She paused for a second before she replied. "Some girl threw them in the garbage when I was in the shower"

I stared at her in shock. How could she say something like that in a simple way? She looked at me. "That's bad! Who did it?!" I said.

She breathed in slowly. Then out.

"Lissana Strauss"

My chest tightened.

…

After Lucy told me about the incident before she went home. I couldn't help but think. Lissana goes to our school? My chest tightened at the thought of her.

I haven't seen her in a long time either. But I miss her. Not as much as before but still. I miss her.

We were child hood best friends. Until grade 2 and everyone transfered to different schools. I haven't seen or heard from her since.

I sighed. I sat in my room. Millions of thought ran through my head. All at once. It made my head hurt.

Why would lissana ever go after Lucy? Someone so innocent? It was puzzling. Lucy was the nicest person I've met so far.

Yeah she was quiet. But I could tell if you got close enough with her. She'd open up eventually. But I should go and see lissana one of these days. See if she changed.

My chest tightened even more just thinking about her.

I went to school. I met up with Lucy in the morning and she seemed happy. "Yesterday day was so much fun after school natsu! You should've been there"

"Really? What happened?"

"I got to visit erza. And do you know jellal?"

"Yeah I met him a couple times"

"We went to this arcade. It was my first time ever going to one" she smiled. "Really?" She nodded and smiled brighter. "I can't wait to go again." She squealed.

We entered school. I held the door open for Lucy. She walked in and continued talking to me. We were laughing and everything. It was fun for the moment of it.

I noticed Lucy's face drop when she looked away. I looked forward to see _her_ and a couple of other girls.

The girl was Lissana strauss.

…


	6. Feelings and an arcade

**Lucy pov**

I felt my stomach turn again. I couldn't breath almost. It was her. The girl who dispised me the most. Who made me cry a million times and spread a million rumors about me behind my back.

Lissana Strauss.

"Hey natsu!" she said in a sugar coated voice. Natsu smiled at her. I looked at the two. Natsu looked happy, but not compared to lissana. She was practically bursting with joy at the seams.

Lissana kept glaring at me when she wasn't fawning over natsu.

"Hey lissana. Longtime no see" he held his hand out. Like he did to me. But she squealed and hugged him. It caught him by surprise.

"I missed you!" She said in that voice again. It sickened me. He pulled away. And smiled nervously. "Natsu you never called me when you were gone" they continued on talking about each other.

I walked away since I couldn't stand it anymore.

One of the girls bumped into me. She scoffed. "Watch it" she spout. "Sorry.." I said and continued walking. I looked back, natsu was talking to lissana. Not noticing I left.

I opened my locker. Erza approached me, giving me a look. She looked towards natsu and lissana. She scoffed. "By the way,I never liked lissana. She's a fake" she said. I could tell it was a try to cheer me up.

"Yeah.. She is" I said. And shut my locker. Erza leaned against the locker.

"Come on Lucy." She said and walked away. I stood there. And stared at the two. I watched as lissana and natsu walked together, talking to each other non stop.

She stopped when she noticed I wasn't behind her. I looked at natsu and lissana one last time. And finally went with erza.

A week later at gym and class, natsu didn't bother following me around like usual. A couple of times he'd tried talking to me. But lissana was forever holding on to him

In gym he wanted to play with me.

"Natsu! Let's go and play over here."

She grabbed his arm and dragged him across the room. I looked for erza and played with her until the game started. Erza kept looking over me and at the two.

I decided to ignore them. They aren't important to me anyway.

In class natsu wanted to be partners with me for a project.

"Natsu can you please be my partner? Becky doesn't want to be mine"

I sighed. And looked at the text book. Natsu held my arm "I'll see you after" he smiled and let go of me. I waved and smiled. I could already see lissana glaring at me again.

They sat two desks away. Lissana kept laughing like everything was funny. Natsu slightly laughed. But he kept looking over to me. I had to go alone since erza was in a different class for the moment.

At the end of the day natsu didn't walk home with me

…

Two weeks later we were finally able to go back to the arcade. I went with erza and jellal again. I saved enough money to buy tokens.

I sat in the stool. The arcade wasn't packed, so we were lucky this time. I was playing pac-man. I pressed one player instead of two. Erza and jellal were having a dance off somewhere in the room.

I continued playing. I kept losing. But my high score was finally rising more and more. It made me happy.

I moved on to a different game and played a few rounds. I heard the Bell on the door jingle. I looked and seen natsu. I waved and he looked at me.

"Hey Luce" he approached me. I smiled and continued playing. "Woah you're good at this" I laughed. At the moment I lost. But I had the highscore.

I spinned around and faced natsu. "So. What brings you here?" I said. He looked around. "Nothing. It's boring everywhere and I heard you were coming here so.."

"So..me?"

He nodded. "Let's play then. Since you're here" he smiled. "Bring it" I smirked, so did he. We ran to the front and got natsu some tokens to play.

We versed on pac-man.

I ended up winning. I celebrated my victory sharing pizza with the 3 of them. Natsu bought the pizza since well..I made a deal with him.

I smiled innocently at natsu from across the table. He growled in annoyance. "I shouldn't have agreed to that deal."

"You're the one who made it!" It was true. He did. I said if I won he has to buy me pizza. If he won I would buy more tokens for him, over 500 at least he said.

"Don't be such a sore loser natsu" erza said with a mouthful of pizza. "I agree." Jellal took another sip of his soda.

"Ah. I'm so stuffed. I'm going home" I said and got up. Everyone else stood up and left out the door with me. "I had fun erza. See you tomorrow!" I said and waved at the two.

Jellal and erza waved back and went the other direction. Soon it was just me and natsu. I stood outside. "Can I walk you home?" He asked me.

I nodded and walked away. Natsu followed behind me.

"That was fun. I hope we could do that again."

"Yeah we should" natsu stretched his arms out and breathed out. "But no more deals." I laughed. "Okay." He laughed too.

It went quiet. We crossed the street and went on the side walk. "Natsu.." I said. He looked at me. "What was the real reason you came to the arcade?"

"Oh that? Um..lissana was suppose to meet me there. But she canceled last minute"

"Oh.." I said and looked at the ground. I knew there was something that had lissana involved. "Is..she nice to you?" I asked. I never heard of lissana being nice, to her friends, no one.

"Yeah she is. She always gives me the leftovers of her lunch and stuff like that… "

I smiled. But inside I felt..jealous? It made me feel weird whenever I heard natsu talking about her. But I was the one who made him talk about it just now.

I breathed in and looked at the stars. They were barely coming out. But they were still shining bright.

"Lucy? What does it mean... if my chest tightens?"

I looked at him. He stopped and looked at me next. "What do you mean by that?" I asked him. He sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

"Like..whenever I think about or i'm around lissana. My chest automatically tightens. Is it like a disease or?"

It made me laugh. He looked at me dead serious. I stopped and smiled. "I think it means you like her" I smiled again.

Realisation went in my head. I felt that same feeling before. But mixed with me feeling like I'm losing something.

"Really?" He stared at me for an answer. "Well is it…a good way or a bad way?" I asked him. "A..good?" He said. I nodded my head. His eyes widened and he went red. Like a tomato red.

"Oh.." He said and covered his mouth. I felt my gut twist instead of turning. And I couldn't help but feel…

Jealous?..

I ignored it and tried to be happy for natsu. "Natsu do you know what this means?" He shook his head. He stared at the ground. "You have a crush!" I exclaimed.

He kept staring at the ground.

"Well..what now? What does that mean?" He said. I smiled. "That means you like her." I put my hand on his arm. He looked at me. "So.. Do I ask her out?"

It was like a sharp pain through the heart when I heard those words.

"If..you want. It's really up to you"

I waited for his answer. He made a face. "Nah. I like me and lissana..like this I guess. Just for now though" I mentally sighed.

When I got home. I felt confused and everything at once. I didn't know how to feel really. I felt jealous of lissana I knew that.

Not of natsu though.. I hope.

I sat on the floor of my room hugging a pillow. I felt my chest tightened as well. I couldn't face the facts. I think its my hatred of lissana.

I didn't want my friends getting mixed up with lissana. I don't want them to go what I went through. I never wanted to trouble my friends.

I sighed. I ignored everything I was feeling. Every last bit of it.

I sat in my room thinking. I should probably ignore these feelings until.. Whenever. I should focus on my friendship with erza and natsu. Not some petty feelings of hatred.

If lissana likes natsu back. I'll be happy for natsu. More than happy.

I hugged the pillow tight.

…

I guess I'll be putting in nighters again for the next chapter.

Please review and enjoy!


	7. Tears

**Lucy pov**

I've been alone lately. Natsu would ditch me, for lissana of course. And erza would be busy since she's on a team for volley ball.

I walked the halls. Nothing to do. It was break. I didn't know what to do really. I would go and see erza play but nobody is allowed on there besides people who are actually playing.

I walked by the bathroom. I heard someone screaming and shouting. It scared me. She was saying something. I heard her and a couple of girls talking. I heard them waling out so I scurried along so they wouldn't see me.

I headed to the library. There wasn't much people there, good. I looked through the bookshelf and picked up a book. I sat down at a table.

I was so into the book I didn't notice the Bell rang. I sighed. I got up and put the book back. I peeked through the bookshelf. And spotted tuffs of pink hair.

I knew who it was. I paused for a second. I didn't talk to him for awhile now. I turned on my heel and went to class.

I stood in the bathroom. Looking in the mirror. I looked awful. My hair was a mess, and the dark circles under my eyes were even darker.

A couple of girls walked in. They stared at me until I left. They scoffed as I exited.

"Ew isn't that Lucy heartfilia?"

I stood by the door. They started talking about me. I didn't care. This was the normal for me anyway. I could stand it.

I went to my locker.

I opened it to find pictures of me everywhere. X's were all over my face. They were taped on the sides of my locker. Where would someone get these?

"Self absorbed bitch"

Everyone started laughing.

Who ever this was made me sick. And they were so lame for just targeting my locker or in the showers. They'd have to do more than that now.

…

 **Lissana pov**

"Shes such a bitch!"

I screamed. I was so frustrated. I can't believe she's trying to steal natsu from me. She can't. I had him first.

Becky and the other girl looked terrified as they stood by each other. Watching me release my anger. I sighed. And splashed water on my face.

"I can't let her" I said. They looked at me confused. "What do you mean?" I wiped my face and turned at them

"Lucy heartfilia. I can't let her have natsu"

"Natsu? That guy you like?"

I nodded. I sat in thought. I need Lucy to get away from him. At all costs. I smirked. I had the perfect plan.

"Let's go" I said. And walked out. The two trailing behind me. They both stayed silent. I heard the Bell and went to class. I waved them good bye.

Next was lunch. But right now was gym.

I seen Lucy by the door. I looked at her head to toe. She was so..

Ugly.

I shook my head and conitnued playing.

 **Natsu pov**

I walked down the hall way. I seen lissana standing by the window looking outside, it was cloudy outside. I smiled and walked towards her. "Hey lissana!" I chirped. She stood there silent.

She sniffled. Like she was crying. I felt my chest hurt. I stood there standing there. "Lissana?" I asked her. She slowly turned and faced me.

Tears streamed down her face. That made my blood boil. I clenched my fists tight. "Natsu?" She said and wiped her face. She acted as if nothing happened.

"Lissana? Why are are you crying?" I tried to say. She shook her head. "Nothing.." She said and looked at her feet. "Why are you crying". She chuckled solemnly.

" I.. Can't say. You wouldn't believe me anyway"

What?

"Who made you cry?" I grabbed her shoulders. She turned to the side. "You'd never believe me if I told you" I shook her. "I will lissana. I promise" she sighed.

"Lucy heartfilia"

I felt my chest tighten again. What? It..can't be. Lucy wouldn't ever. She couldn't hurt a living thing, even threatening a person didn't seem like her.

"See? I knew you wouldn't"

"I do believe you" I said without realising. "She threatened me. To stay away from you. She told me she'd hurt me if she seen me with you" I felt my hand go weak.

"She said she'd do awful things.. Things she couldn't say"

"Why would she?-"

"She likes you"

I felt my chest tighten again. And my stomach had butterflies. I felt joyful for some reason. I forgot what this was called.

"She… does?"

Lissana started crying again. A tear streamed down her cheek.

"Promise..me something"

I looked at her. She stared me in the eyes.

"Don't go around her anymore. Or talk to her"

I felt even more weak. I couldn't process this through my head. What was happening?

"I'm scared she might do something to you too"

I breathed in. And smiled. "Of course lissana" she wiped her tear and smiled.

…

 **Lucy pov**

The next day was weird. I kept having people look at me. That was normal to me usually. But it was a more, colder stare. I felt like I was in that nightmare again.

I walked up natsu. "Hey natsu!" I said and smiled. He turned over and glared at me. My smile faded. "Oh.. You're here now" he said in a cold voice. It made me feel small.

"Yeah..I am" I said. He sighed. And turned his back on me. "Natsu? Did you wanna have lunch with me and erza again?" I asked him.

"No. I have other friends I wanna have lunch with"

"I..see" I said and walked away. I sat down in class. The Bell rang and everyone came in. Natsu sat in his seat. I looked at him and smiled. He turned the other way and started writing in his book.

I sat at the table with erza for lunch again. She and I finished early since she was busy again.

I walked down the hall and spotted natsu. I waved at him. He rolled his eyes and walked towards me. I slowly frowned.

He towered over me. I didn't notice he was this tall.

"Natsu? Are you okay?" I asked him. He closed his eyes. He didn't answer me. "What's wrong? Are you feeling sick?" I asked him again

No reply.

I sighed. "Lucy." He said. I looked up, his once onyx eyes were now a cold dark black. "Leave me alone" he said. I stood there. He glared at me. "What?" I said. He growled.

"Meet me at the side of the building at the end of the day."

He walked away. I stood there. I felt funny. "Leave me alone." Those words rung in my ears. Why would he say that? Did I do something?

What did I do?

I stood by the side of the building. Clutching my bag nervously. Everyone was going home or going on the bus. I stood there. There was a silence.

Then I heard grass crunching.

I looked to see natsu walking towards me. I tried smiling. He looked away.

"Hey natsu-" he interrupted me. "Look Lucy…" he trailed on. I had a bad feeling. "I can't.. See you anymore" he said and stared at the ground. His head was held low.

I couldn't. I didn't want to believe it. See me anymore? What does he mean by he can't? We're friends..

Right?

"What do you mean?" I asked him. "Tch." He said. I stared at him dumbfounded. He looked up at me. Those eyes scared me. "You really are a blonde" he said.

"After what you did to her-"

"Did what to who?!"

He went silent. "I don't know what I did. But I know everyone knows. Am I right?"

He stayed quiet. All we could hear was the wind going by and the rustling of the grass and plants.

"I dont wanna be friends anymore" he said very fast. But I understood them.

I felt like crying. I would probably later. He hung his head low again. "I can't.. Forgive you after what you did to lissana" I felt the tears coming.

"What did I do?!"

I repeated. "You're the one who told her to stay away from me. And you threatened her? I can't forgive anyone who would do that to my friends" he said.

He turned on his heel. "Friends?" I said. He stopped. "Lissana has never been my friend! She's hates me! She has never been once nice to me! She's the bully!"

"Well she's my friend"

I sighed.

" _Don't talk to me again"_

I felt a tear go down my face. Natsu never once looked back. He started walking away. Never saying anything. Or even give a wave.

He just left.

I started crying. I fell to my knees. I can't believe this. I trusted him.

I knew this was lissana's doing. It has to be.

I got up and wiped my tears.

I started running. Running last everyone until I got to the corner. Capricorn sat there reading a newspaper. I breathed in. "Sorry I'm late" I said and got in the car.

We drove off.

I looked in the rearview mirror.

Natsu wasn't standing there.

…


	8. Grade 6

**Lucy pov**

It was grade 6 now. It's been tough for me, since natsu ignores me now. For what ever reason I did he hasn't talked to me since that day. When we were beside the building once again.

At the place where we met.

Everyone hates me more than ever now. But I hold it all in.

"I swear to god Lucy. I'm going to rip off their heads one of these days" erza said through her teeth. She's been over protective these days.

.What happened after the incident with natsu.

"Lucy what's wrong?!" Erza came running towards me. I was still crying after natsu left. Erza found me. I told her what all happened. She clenched her fists tight.

"I'm going to kick his ass." She spout and stomped away. I hugged her from behind again to stop her. She paused, "erza please don't." Was all I said.

"Lucy. You can't just met them do this to you" she said and held my arms. "I..know." I said. She sighed and tried getting free. "But its better this way. I don't want you getting on trouble for something I did".

"But Lucy. That's the thing. You did nothing."

I froze. I let go of her. It was true. Me and natsu's friendship ended for something I didn't do. I don't know what I did. Everyone else knows but me.

"I'll let them live.. Just for today" erza said and started walking.

She didn't bother them or say anything to them.

I sat in the chair outside. I looked around. My heart dropped. I seen lissana's little group walking inside. Natsu was standing with them. He looked at me. I felt funny, I looked away and started talking with erza.

His eyes were still that cold black.

We finished our lunches. I went inside with erza. We split when we went to class.

"Hey heartfilia kid"

I froze in my spot.

They walked up to me. "Heard you were trying to talk shit about lissana again" one of them pushed me against the wall. They were so close it was hard to breath.

"You realise you aren't wanted here right?"

I tried pushing them away. "Leave me alone please" I said trying to budge them. "You're no fun." They said. The person got off of me.

"If I hear you trying to talk bullshit again about lissana.."

They paused.

 _"you're dead heartfilia."_

They walked away. Laughing at me. The people around me were staring at me. "What?…" I whispered. What is it I'm saying about lissana? I bite my tongue in order for me to say nothing all the time, so why was everyone saying I'm the one bullshitting?

It made me exhausted. Emotionally. Everything did now a days.

I went to my locker to get my bag.

It was gone.

I looked everywhere I thought it would be. I checked outside, the smell of something burning filled my nose. I looked at the group of people surrounding the flames.

My bag was the thing burning. The flames engulfed it as it turned slowly into charcoal.

"W-wha?" I said. Everyone stared at me, they started laughing at me again. They were always laughing at me.

"I told you. This is just a warning" the guy from earlier said as he walked past me.

I seen white. My vision blurred.

I can't faint right now. I can't. I started to blink. My vision came back.

Natsu looked at me. I stared at him. His eyes showed regret. But he turned away and started walking.

I felt the lump in my throat again.

I started running. Again. It was all I could do at the moment. I ran to the corner. I didn't bother saying a word to Capricorn. All I could say was,

"Drive"

He started the car and drove off. I felt embarrassed. I couldn't help but bite my tongue again. To stop from crying. Or holding my breath so the lump wouldn't dare come up.

I went home. And fell asleep.

…

3 weeks after I was was going to start walking home. When I seen lissana and her petty little group.

I felt scared again. I tried going past them. But one of them spotted me trying to pass by.

"Hey isn't that the girl?"

They all looked at me. Natsu wasn't there. Thank god.

"She's the one calling me down" lissana said. Trying to act innocent as she sat around the boys. Bixslow, gajeel, and gray sat there. They were all friends of natsu. So they knew me.

They kept quiet and looked away.

One of them threw an egg at me. It exploded in my hair.

"Bullseye!"

They all laughed. "Dude stop it leave her alone" gray said. "Shut up gray." The one said. Gray looked away again.

I tried walking away. But my legs felt stuck. And my knees felt weaker than that day. I stood there. Frozen in fear as they all grabbed an egg each.

They all threw them at me. All at once. I panicked. Fear struck me. I couldn't move. I wanted to so badly.

The eggs exploded all over me. The egg whites were sticky on my clothes and hair. It reminded me of my night mare. I felt suffocated.

I couldn't breath.

I fell to my knees and started crying. I knew I shouldn't have. But I did.

"Oh shit is she crying?!" They all started talking. "Ha-ha!" One of them said. "The bitch is crying" lissana said as she laughed. Gray started getting mad. I didn't get to hear what he said, but he was furious.

They were all panicked and scrambling when erza appeared.

"You bastard's!" I heard erza say. She had a broom in her hand. They all froze with fear. She charged. Screaming as she ran.

I didn't see her attacking them. I didn't want to believe any thing that was happening now or around me.

I closed my eyes.

It was just a nightmare right? None of this is happening. It can't be. It's just my nightmare.

I blanked out.

"Lucy?"

I opened my eyes. I was in my room. Laying on my bed. Jellal and erza were at my bed side. They both had the same look, relief and panic mixed together.

"Lucy!" Erza exclaimed. She hugged me. I noticed I didn't have the eggs in my hair or on me.

I prayed for it to be a nightmare.

"Lucy oh god I'm glad you're okay. Please tell me you're okay" I smiled. "I'm okay." I said. She breathed out.

"What..happened?"

Erza went dim for a second.

She told me everything. I started remembering. How lissana laughed at me when they threw them at me. That sinister smile of hers when she threw hers.

"It's like my nightmare"

Jellal and erza looked at me confused. "I had a night mare like this. Where they all threw eggs at me. Laughed and humiliated me. This was it right?" I said.

They both stayed quiet. "This was the nightmare. The true one" I said. Erza grabbed ahold of my hand and squeezed it. "It's not Lucy" she said sternly.

"How is it not?" I said. A tear streamed down my face. Erza looked down. "I lost a friend. Been humiliated a million of times. Been shunned. All by a girl who has power" I said.

I started to cry again.

"You can't go back there" jellal said. Erza and jellal looked at me. I sighed. I couldn't. I wouldn't even if it did mean the end of the world.

"Lucy.."

"I can't face natsu like this either" I said. Erza had her head hung even lower. "I can't." I broke down. Erza and jellal were silent as I cried.

"Lucy. I'll be there for you. Through good and bad. You know that." Erza hugged me. Jellal smiled at me and put a hand on my shoulder.

"You guys should come to my school." Jellal said. Erza looked at him. So did I. "It's hell at the other school isn't it? I promise to protect you guys there." Jellal said.

"Lucy?" Erza looked at me, waiting for my answer. I nodded my head yes, in a skip of a heart beat. I needed to get away from everything there.

"I will go. But I have some things I have to deal with first"

…

Me and erza had to go back to the school. To do the paper work and whatever. And to tell everyone else.

"Ah Lucy. Erza, what brings you here?" Makarov said as he smiled cheerfully on his desk. "We need to..tell you something" erza said.

"It's about lissana strauss"

His face changed. He sat there with his ears and eyes open. Listening to every word I told him. I began from when I first came. How the bullying started. To natsu and lissana. And finally the egg attack.

We stood there. Waiting for his opinion. His face became red. He gritted his teeth. "H-how. How can one of my children do that to a human being?!" He spout out in anger.

"Bring lissana strauss and natsu dragneel to my office now!" He said in the intercom.

We waited.

Lissana and natsu came strolling in. Smiling. Natsu's face dropped when he seen me and erza standing there. I looked away and faced makarov.

He shouted at lissana and natsu. He was so furious you could see the vein bulging in his forehead.

"Lissana Strauss! You are now suspended as a warning until next semester"

Lissana stood there silent. "Lissana?" Natsu said. He tried to comfort are but she stormed out. Natsu stood there, in silence. "As for you natsu. Same punishment as lissana".

"You don't have to makarov"

Everyone in the room looked at me. "I'm leaving anyway. Both of us. But if you'd like you could do whatever" I said. Makarov sat there thinking.

I smiled and nodded and walked out.

I walked past natsu. He stopped me. "Luce.. I-" I stopped him. "Don't." I said. "Just because you're in trouble now doesn't mean for you to say sorry. I don't want anything concerning you or lissana from now on" I walked out.

I didn't look back.

Erza followed behind me. We left the building. Not caring about anything or about anyone but besides each other.

 _I felt a weight lift off my shoulders._

…

Whoo! Done this one. Sorry if Its late.

Please review and enjoy!


	9. Regret

**Natsu pov**

"Did you hear about that Lucy kid?"

"I heard she transferred to a different school with that erza girl. You know? The red haired girl?"

"I'm glad for her"

"Yeah. I felt bad for her. But lissana should be happy"

I over head the conversation. My heart stopped every time I heard Lucy's name. I felt bad. But she made lissana cry, and threatened her. So.. I guess I made it even..

Right?

"Hey natsu" lissana said and sat on my desk. She smiled at me and waved. "Oh. Hi lissana" she yawned and stretched her arms. "I'm so happy right now" she chirped.

"Lucy's gone." She said. Again I felt that regret. "I was really scared for a moment there. But now that she's gone I feel safe.. Natsu." I clenched my fists.

"Well at least you're happy right?" I said. She looked at me. "Now that she's gone. You don't care about anything else" she frowned.

"Where did that additude come from" she scoffed. "I thought out of everyone you'd be happy" I frowned and looked at my lap.

"I'm heading to my own class now. I'll see you at lunch" she hopped off and left. I stayed quiet. I.. Couldn't think. The only thing on my mind was her. Lucy.

She left?

It's been a week. No sign of Lucy anywhere, her desk is empty. No one sat at the table we ate lunch at anymore. No one was there to stand at the side lines at gym. No one was there. There was no Lucy.

Why should I be worried about her? I like lissana don't I? It's retribution right? For me to leave her, its… retribution. It has to be.

I felt the regret sinking more and more everyday. I missed her. Why didn't I miss her when she was here? Why didn't I talk to her? I breathed in as I walked home.

I remember the first time we walked here. She told me about.. Lissana. How she was to her. What she did. But I remember her smile, her laugh.

I shook my head. I can't miss her. She should miss me. I broke things off anyway. It's her that should be sad. Sad without me. But its me thats sad without her.

I also remember when we met. She was crying. Crying her heart out at school. I never knew what she was crying about. But it seemed bad. Her and erza always hid it from me.

I bet erza hates me now. For what I did. But its retribution. I know it is. I also bet that Lucy hates me most of all. She hates my guts, Our friendship, the moments we spent. I bet she regrets it all.

I wouldn't hate her if she did.

...

 **Lucy pov**

Im at jellal's school now. It's pretty fun. Everyone gave a warm welcome to me and erza. I even met some of jellal's friends. They all acted nice, no they didn't act.

They _are_ nice.

I smiled as I walked down the halls. I couldn't help but be a bubble of joy.

I escaped my hell. The school that tortured me since the moment I got there. I escaped lissana's grip. And natsu's.

"Hey you're Lucy right? Lucy heartfilia?" I turned. I seen a girl with blue hair tied back with a ribbon. She was short and petite. She was cute.

"Yes that's me" I said. She fumbled with her hands. She raised it at me. "I'm.. Levy mcgarden" I grabbed her hand and shook her hand. She smiled.

" _hey?are you crying_?"

I widened my eyes. She let go. She started talking. I was blanking out again.

" _i'm natsu dragneel"_

I shook my head. "… I guess we're in class together. Let's make the best of it!" She cheered as the Bell rang. I smiled. I nodded as she walked away. I followed behind her.

I was walking home with erza and jellal. They lived near me, thank god. So we always walked home together. I couldn't hell but think about the other school. How it must be without me there.

They all must be happy, celebrating. Celebrating that I left, lissana was probably the most happiest of all. I looked down. Natsu must be happy too. Happy he can be with lissana now.

"I'll see you guys later!" I shouted. They waved and turned as they walked away. I ran towards the front door of my house. I breathed in as I got in. I was so tired. I was actually able to play in gym today.

I went to my room. I took off my school uniform and went into the shower. My dad was happy that I wanted to go to a private school. I practically fought to go to a public school, just to be normal.

Worst decision I've made.

I was walking to meet erza. We were supposed to go and see levy. Levy also became my best friend. She's super nice, shes even a bigger book worm than me. The three of us we inseparable.

I smiled thinking about it.

I looked up. My heart instantly dropped. I felt weak in the knees again.

Lissana strauss.

"Hey Blondie long time no see"

She walked towards me. Her little posse behind her. She smirked. Oh how much I wanted to wipe it off her face. "Heard you ditched. How's the other school? Do they actually like you?" She crossed her arms.

"Yeah they do." I said. She frowned. "I'm glad natsu doesn't hang around you anymore," she stared at me with her beady eyes. "He's actually rejoicing right now, glad that you left." I breathed in.

"Good. I'm glad I'm away from him too" I said as I walked up to her. "N-natsu doesn't want to see you anymore" she stuttered. I smiled. "Good." She stepped back. "You bitch" she said, I smiled again and ignored it.

"You can all go to hell. Especially you" I said and pushed her. She stared at me. I looked away and began walking away. "This isn't over!" She shouted. I stopped. And started walking away.

I didn't look back.

…

 **Natsu pov**

I sat in school. I haven't had much sleep. I've been up thinking or doing something. The hours passed by fast. I picked at my lunch. I never put hot sauce in it anymore. It tasted bitter to me now.

"Natsu." I looked up. Gray was looking down at me. "I need to talk to you. After school" he slammed his hands on the table and looked at me. "It's about Lucy" I sighed. I nodded. He got up and walked away.

I didn't eat my lunch.

"What now" I said as I put my hands in my pockets. He walked up to me, fast. He punched me in the face. "That's for Lucy" he said. I fell to the ground. I sat up. He stared at me again.

"What were you thinking?!" He yelled. "How could you do that to her?! How could you just throw her away?!" He growled. I frowned. "You dont know what she went through before you came!" I stared at the ground.

"She never smiled. Did you know that?" He said. "No" I said and got up. I dusted my pants off and looked at him. "She was practically zombie. No smiling. No sign of emotion. Just sadness." He said quietly.

"Then you came"

He clenched his fists. "She started to smile. For once. It made happy. I was glad for her..." He gritted his teeth. "But you wrecked it all. All for lissana?" He questioned me. I stared at the ground. I looked at my shoes.

"Lissana was the one who made her the zombie."

I paused. Lissana? She.. She couldn't. No.

"Lissana was the one who picked at her. Bullied her. Made her depressed. Had everyone shun her away.."

"No…" I whispered.

"Erza became her friend. But she barely smiled."

"No.." I said even quieter. My voice was bare.

 _"You destroyed her smile_ "

I felt like crying. And vomit came to my mouth. I swallowed it. The lump in my throat didn't go down.

"You bastard! She didn't deserve this! None of this should've happened to her!" He was about to swing another punch at me.

I spreaded my arms. As if I surrendered. He stopped. "Do it" I said, he put his arm down. "I deserve it" he gritted his teeth again. "Please…" I felt the tears coming.

"No."

I looked up at the sky. "You don't deserve it." He stood there. Clenching his fist trying hard not to punch me. "You deserve to rot in regret." He spit on the ground and walked away.

I fell to my knees.

I started to cry. I couldn't handle this. All of it. It made my stomach turn. My chest hurt. I kept thinking about her. Lucy heartfilia. I wanted to cry even harder every time I thought about her.

"Lucy…"

 **Lucy pov**

"I seen lissana"

Erza paused. We sat beside each other on the bench outside. "That bitch" she said obviously angry. I put my hand on top of her hand. She sighed. "What did she do?" I looked ahead.

"Told me that natsu was happy I left, she was too obviously. I told her to go to hell" she laughed. "Good. I hope she does." I smiled and started laughing.

"I'm happy for you. You stood up for yourself." I smiled. I did. I actually did. It made me proud. "Yeah." I said. She grabbed my hand. "I'm still..scared of her though." She looked at me.

"Why? What did she do?" I sighed and lifted my head. "She said it wasn't over." She sighed too. "Well next time. I'll be there." She squeezed my hand. I smiled.

The next time I seen lissana was when me and erza were walking home. Jellal had some other things to do he said. So it was just me and her. Erza did keep her promise.

"I told you" lissana said. She walked up to me. She pulled up her phone. And typed in a few words. "This wasn't over" she flashed the screen at me.

There was a message. Sent to lissana from natsu.

" _Lucy? I'm glad she left. She was so annoying. And a bitch. Of course I'm happy she left"_

I stood there. So it was true. He didn't want me there anymore. I looked at the screen. Disappointed. Lissana smirked again. She stuffed the phone in her pocket

"So? Thoughts?" She stared at me. "Yeah actually." She looked surprised. "Natsu can be happy all he wants. I don't want to see him again" she laughed.

"Leave her alone" erza stepped in front of me. "Fine." She said. She turned on her heel and left. "I'll be seeing you again." She waved.

Once she left erza yelled in frustration. "That bitch!" She kicked the garbage can near by. "What did she do?" I said. "Everything! She just-" she breathed out.

"I hate her. For everything she did to you. For wrecking everything" I put a hand on erza's back. "Its okay" I said. She looked at me. Her eyes started to water.

"Lucy.." She started crying. I hugged her. She cried into my chest as we stood at the sidewalk.

"H-how can you not cry?" She asked me wiping her face. "I cried many times. At home, school, you name it."

" _Dont cry"_

I stopped. "What is it?" She asked me. "Nothing." I said. She nodded and see started walking home.

When I finally got home. I felt weak. Weaker than the last. I fell to the floor. And started crying. I didn't know why I did. But I cried. Hard. I couldn't help but feel the emptiness.

Natsu didn't want me there anymore. That's what bothered me the most. What was my friendship to him? What were those memories to him? A game?

A game to make me feel like the worst person in the world? To make me cry? Make me even more depressed?

I started to cry even more. Pouring my heart out.

I fell asleep. When the crying became to much. When I couldn't handle it anymore.

I fell asleep on the floor.

…

I'm sorry I didn't post last night. I had my tablet taken away XD. But here it is. Enjoy

this chapter makes me seem sadistic XD

Please review


	10. Pain and realising

**Lucy pov**

I opened my eyes. The light flashed in my eyes, making me flinch. I sat up and looked around. I had a pounding headache. My eyes were puffy, and my throat was dry. I swallowed.

What happened?

Oh..right. I cried my self to sleep again. I stood up and stretched my arms out. I got in the shower quickly. I rubbed my eyes the entire time so they would go down a bit.

I sat in my room after I was done changing. I couldn't help but think about that message. Did natsu actually send that? Was I actually a bitch to him? I sighed. I looked at the time. It was 10 am. Good thing today was Saturday.

I yawned and laid down again on my bed. I couldn't sleep so I laid there. Thinking.

I haven't thought this much in… ever.

I turned onto my side.

Natsu… he was.. Always on my mind. Why? Why do I feel this chest tightening everytime I thought of him? Or pictures him? I knew this feeling once.

" _Like..whenever I think about or I'm around lissana. My chest automatically tightens. Is it like a disease or?"_

What?

" _I think it means you like her"_

I covered my mouth.

 _"You have a crush!"_

I widened my eyes. I felt everything come flying at me at once. It was like a slap to the face.

I liked natsu.

I stood up and ran our of my room. I grabbed my jacket and ran. I just ran. To the place I thought of first. I felt the wind through my hair. I breathed heavily.

I came to a halt when I got there. To erza's.

I knocked on the door. The door swung open. "Lucy?" Erza said and she grabbed my shoulders. "Come in" she pulled me inside.

"So… you like him?"

I nodded. She clenched her fists. "Erza I know but-" she stared at me. I went quiet. "After everything? After he abandoned you?" I sighed.

"Erza I think I liked him even before that."

"You think" she said sternly. I nodded. "I've just came to realize it just now. Literally" she slammed her hands on the table. "Lucy." She looked into my eyes.

"You realise you're only going to get hurt right?"

"I'm not going to do anything"

She sighed. I sat there.

"I'm not stopping you. I'm warning you. Natsu always has liked lissana. And who's to say he won't abandon you again"

"I don't plan on telling him. Or doing anything."

She breathed out and crossed her arms. I closed my eyes. "It's fine. But I'll beat his ass if he does it again" I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm not even going to try erza. So don't worry"

She smiled. I smiled back. "You know I just want what's best for you. I hate seeing you hurt" I waved my hands. "I know erza. But don't worry everything's going to be okay"

She frowned.

..

I walked down the street. It was quiet, and this area barely had any cars passing by. So it was always still.

I was going to this bookstore. I needed some more since I read everything I had, even the books in my dad's study. I'm lucky I have levy.

I breathed in the air. Finally. I was alone. Sure I was most times. But I never did bask in it, or enjoy it. I smiled. I looked up ahead. I turned around the corner.

My heart and everything with it dropped.

I stared at the person in front of me. They stared back at me. I couldn't do anything. I was stuck.

I stared into his black eyes. They weren't cold. But they were still the inky black I came to know.

Natsu stood in front of me. I stepped back. His eyes widened even more. I tried running away. But he grabbed my wrist and pulled me close.

"Lucy wait!"

"No" I said and pushed him away. He looked at me, frowning. "Lucy" he said. I stopped and looked at my feet. I could feel his eyes looking at me.

"Lucy… I'm-" I put a hand out. "Don't." I barely get out. "I don't want your concern or pity" he breathed out. He stepped closer to me. I stepped back again. "Please Lucy." He pleaded.

"No natsu. Don't" I say and look up. Tears were already in the corner of my eyes. "Please don't." I say. "Lucy I just wanted to say I'm sorry" I shook my head. "I'm sorry"

"Now you're sorry? Why is that? Why didn't you say it when I was there?" He hung his head low.

"I don't want to hear this." I say and try to walk past him. He grabbed my arm again. "Please Lucy" I looked at him. I grabbed my arm away from him. "Lucy I… I can't ever make it up to you. But I'm sorry"

"Sorry? You're sorry?!" I say. He flinched. "You're just saying that to make your self feel better! You don't care about anyone else" he stared at me again, teary eyed.

"Don't make me feel bad for something you did"

"I never wanted you to!" He shouted. I stopped. "Then..why?…" he sighed. He looked at me. I knew immediately what he meant.

Lissana.

"So.. You listened to her" I said. "Lucy..I-" I interrupted him "no no. It's okay. Just as long as shes happy right? And even if your actions make me miserable it's alright?" He clenched his fists.

"Miserable?"

I sighed. "Of course. You didn't think about how I felt"

"No its not like that" he stared at me. I smiled. And a tear rolled down my face. He stared at me with his eyes wide. "Then what is it? What was I to you? Some kind.. Of game?"

"I only did it because you threatened her! I told you that"

"So.. You believed her?… you out of everyone should know that I wouldn't do that. Not even to lissana"

"But still! I didn't know what I was thinking!"

I wiped my face. "You're just like the rest…" I put my head down. "I can't believe I trusted you" I felt the tears coming down fast. I wiped them and looked at him again.

"Lucy…"

I started yelling. "You are such a selfish bastard!" I never felt so frustrated in my life. "Do you hate me?" I stayed quiet.

"Do you regret it?" He said. I stopped. "Do you regret our memories together? The fun moments? When we laughed together? Do you regret it?"

I stood there.

"No"

He looked relieved. I kept staring at him. He stared back.

"I regret meeting you."

His face dropped.

"I regret it. I regret it when I thought you were different, I regret thinking you were my friend, I regret it when I believed your words. Thinking I could trust you"

He stared at the ground. I couldn't see his face. But I knew he was listening.

"I regret putting you above everyone else! Having these feelings. I regret for ever liking you!"

He lifted his head fast. I looked away from his eyes. He frowned even more then his eyes widened. "What?!" I turned on my heel and started running away. Crying. I didn't care what he was about to say.

I just wanted to get away. Far away.

…

I sat in class. I haven't heard from natsu since that day.

It's been a week now.

What am I expecting anyway? Another lie? I sighed. I shouldn't have told him. I liked him. I only just came to realize it. So why did I tell him?

I could've gotten away. I wrecked everything now. I can't face erza now. She'll get mad if she knew I told him. I sighed.

I turned my head looked out the window.

I sat at a bench outside. Erza and jellal said they'd meet up when they were finished. So I said I'd wait here until they were finished. It was cold out. I breathed into my hands for warmth.

"Hey Blondie"

I looked up. Lissana stood there. She and her little group. They all smirked at me, I feel like something bad was about to happen.

"Hey. I heard you like natsu"

I froze. "Where did you hear that?!" She laughed. "As if natsu wouldn't tell me" I stared at the ground. He.. Told her? "I thought you didn't want to be around him" she walked toward me.

"I didn't say that. Besides. He was the one who wanted to talk to me"

She pushed me.

"Stay away from him"

"I just said he wanted to talk to me!"

"Do you want me to make you stay away from him?"

I shouted. "What's your problem?!" She chuckled "you." She stated. "I can't stand you. Now you're trying to take him away from me?" Her group walked towards me.

They grabbed my arms. I struggled to get loose. They held me tight as I squirmed under their grip. "You disgust me" she said in my face. She smiled and kicked me in the stomach.

I felt the pain surge through me.

They let go of me and let me fall to the ground. I coughed. "You bitch" she said. And kicked me again. I coughed even more. It hurt. Badly.

"Awe the blondie is hurt" she said in a girly voice. She kicked me even harder than last time. "This is for being a pest" she kicked me again. I kept coughing. Groaning in pain. The pain got worse and worse.

"Ha-ha ha!" She laughed. She picked me up by the collar and punched me. I fell to the cold hard ground. I felt dizzy. Everything felt weird. My stomach and back ached with pain.

"Stupid bitch!" She cackled. She kicked me again. I started blanking out. I coughed up blood. I sat up and stared at it.

I heard them laughing at me. Their voices started to fade. The world started to turn.

I fell to the ground again. My eyes felt heavy. Everything looked fuzzy. I was in so much pain. I felt my stomach. My face felt even worse.

I closed my eyes.

…

Oh god I'm so sorry for not updating. I was so busy this weekend. I guess now this means no sleep again XD

please review and enjoy!


	11. Healing

**Lucy pov**

I opened my eyes. The room had poor lighting. I scanned the room. Erza was asleep at my feet. Jellal had his eyes closed and was sitting in a chair. Levy was also passed out by my feet.

I sat up. Erza jumped up. She scared me "Lucy?!" She said. Waking up the other two. I smiled. Erza jumped at me and hugged me. So did levy. "Lucy!" Levy hugged me tighter.

"Don't do that to us again!" Erza said as she sniffled into my shoulder. "I won't.." I hugged them back. Jellal stared at me and smiled. I felt pain shock through my stomach.

I flinched and groaned. They both let go and sat back. "Sorry" levy said. I grabbed my stomach. "What happened?" I asked her. She frowned and sighed. She grabbed the chair behind her and sat down.

"Lissana.. Beat you.."

"You had some internal bleeding.. They did surgery on you the other day. It.. Shouldn't leave a scar"

Levy handed me a mirror. I grabbed it and looked into it. My reflection bounced off, I seen my self with my head in bandages. I lifted my shirt up, it was all wrapped up too. The memories came back.

I remember now.

"Lu-chan.."

I gave it back to her. I sighed. "What did I do to deserve this?" I said. "Where… did I go wrong in life?" I asked. They all stared at me, their eyes dim and their smiles were gone. "What did.. I do?" I whispered. I wanted to cry.

"Lucy"

"Just… what did I do wrong"

I started crying. "Nothing. You did nothing wrong" erza hugged me. I cried into her shoulder. She did too.

After what seemed an eternity of silence and tears we stopped. I wiped my face of the tears I cried.

"Natsu.. Came here by the way" I wiped my face. Levy smiled at me nervously. "He left you some flowers.." I looked to the side and seen a bouquet of flowers sitting in a vase of water.

"I kicked him out." Erza said. She smiled. "I let him in for a bit though. Jellal.. Held me back" I looked at my lap. "How long have I been out?" Again they all looked down. "About 2 days.. From shock" I felt like something was taken away from me. time.

"Natsu.. Left you a note too. Well.. A letter" Erza handed me a peice of paper. I opened it. They all left the room. Shutting the door behind them. I breathed in before I started reading.

" _dear Lucy,_

 _I'm sorry I can't say this in person. I'm probably a coward for not facing you. But I wanted to say a few things. Without you interrupting me. I didn't want to see your face either. I'd cry if I do._

 _1)I'm sorry. I'm sorry, for all of it. Leaving you. Hurting you. Making you sad. I shouldn't have done that, ever.I' be able to make up for it. But I'm sorry. And I'm not asking for your forgiveness either. But I'm sorry._

 _2) I'm trying hard to forget about lissana. I can't forgive her either. Not for what she's done to you. And erza told me everything. From when it started, to now. After hearing that. I..._ _Couldn't_ _can't believe my self sometimes... I.. Can't. Why didn't you tell me before? Why did you hide it from me? You know I would've helped you anyway I could've"_

Liar.

 _3) I like you-"_

I stopped reading. My heart beated faster. I held the note to my chest. My head spinned. He liked me? I shook my head and breathed out.

I kept reading.

 _"I like you too. I always did. I think I'm... Just starting to realize it now. I'm such a fool, a stupid fool. I should've notice it before. All this time I thought it was lissana. Remember? I'm such an idiot for not realizing sooner._

 _I'm sorry"_

I started to cry. Again. I seen the tear fall into the paper. I sobbed my heart out. I felt.. Empty. Lost. Confused would be the word. He liked me? Then why?…

Why would he leave me?

I wiped my face. I couldn't cry anymore. I don't want to cry anymore. It made me feel weak. And powerless. I reminded me of the times lissana teased me. Humiliated me. Hurt me.

I laid back and waited for the others to come back.

…

"Dad?"

My dad stood there. He smiled. "Oh thank god you're okay" he came and hugged me. I hugged him back. He held me tight.

"Lucy.. We wanted to talk.. About school and the girl who did this to you"

"Who was it?"

I sat there. I looked at my dad. "Lissana Strauss" erza sat beside him. Jellal and levy waited outside. "What exactly did they do to you" I lifted my shirt. Their faces changed when they seen my bandages.

"Typically they beat me up. Outside of my own school. Laughing as they kicked me. Punched me. Called me down. Lissana was the one who did it all really"

My dad looked like he was about to cry. He stared at the ground. "I knew you shouldn't have gone to that school.." My dad whispered. He was right. I remember fighting and arguing with him about going to a public school for once.

"And this lissana? She goes to your old school right?"

I nodded.

"Lissana. Hates me for some reason. I don't know what. But she threatened me before she beated me up."

"What did she say."

"Telling me to stay away from natsu. Natsu dragneel is a… acquaintance of mine. She likes him I think"

"So its over some.. Boy?"

I laughed at them. They stared at me. "No. Like in hell I'd fight over something idiotic as that. Like I said. She's hated me ever since I got there"

"You didn't tell me? All this time?.." My dad said. "I didn't because I thought… I'd be a nuisance to you. You were always gone anyway"

"Lucy. Don't you ever say that. You were never a nuisance to me. And you could've told Aquarius or Virgo to tell me"

I smiled. "I know." He slightly grinned at me.

"So it was natsu dragneel and lissana strauss who did this?"

"Just lissana" erza interrupted. "Natsu.. Didn't do anything" I said. The lawyer scribbled onto his note pad.

After a day or two I was released. It was just my stomach that would be bruised. The surgery they said went okay. It wasn't too serious.

I didn't go to school though. I finished grade 6, they home schooled me for the rest of grade 7.

I was still able to go and see levy and erza. But my dad preferred for me to be at home until I was done healing. I stared at my self in the mirror. I looked at my stomach. It was now a purple bruise.

I pressed on it. I expected it to hurt, it didn't.

I stood outside. Where I last seen natsu. I sighed. It was so long ago now. I stood there. Thinking. Reliving the memories.

"Luce"

I turned around. Natsu smiled. "What are you doing here" he walked towards me. "I.. Don't know really. I had a feeling you'd be here" he stood beside me. I stared at the ground.

"Lucy?"

I looked at him. "Did.. You read my letter?" I picked into my pocket and brought it out. I showed him. He looked at it and conitnued staring at the ground.

"So..are you still recovering?"

I grabbed my stomach. I nodded. He stared at my hands. And then my head. "What did she do?" I chuckled. "Called me down. Pushed me to the ground. They laughed as she kicked me and punched me until I passed out."

He was shaking now. It wasn't from the cold either.

"So yeah. And the kicking?"

He stared at me.

"It caused internal bleeding"

He covered his mouth. "How?.." I kicked the ground softly. "That's what she's really like natsu." I said. He looked up now. Instead of down.

"And I.. Did that to you.."

"I'm scared now. Natsu. I'm scared to have friends. Or meeting new people. Anxiety. I'm always sad. Or crying my self to sleep now. Depression. I.."

He hugged me. "I'm sorry" he hugged me tighter. His head was in my shoulder. He kept whispering "I'm so sorry…". I pushed him off when I couldn't. Breath. So did he.

"I'm such a coward Lucy.. I should've told you in person.. My feelings. Everything. I should've told you"

I stood there listening to him. "I should've stayed there. At the hospital. With you, erza, jellal your friend levy. I should've been there when you woke up. And told you right then and there."

"Natsu.."

"But I'm so.. Deeply sorry"

He started crying. "I'm so sorry!" He fell to his knees. "I can't.. I'm sorry" I kneeled in front of him. I hugged his head. He burrowed it into my chest. Grabbing my sweater as he sobbed.

He let go. And stared at me. I smiled. "Don't do that Lucy." He shook his head. "I don't deserve to see your smile… I.. Gray said I destroyed your smiled.."

"You did.. At one point… but.. That doesn't mean.. It can't be fixed."

He looked away. "I.. Don't deserve it.. I dont deserve seeing you smile. I don't deserve you"

"I didn't ask for this either natsu.."

He stared at me. I sat on the ground still, so did he.

"I didn't want this life… all I wanted was to be normal. Not a spoiled rich kid.. And.. I.. Made the wrong choice. Of going to that school. Meeting you. Meeting lissana. Now look at me… I guess.. I did ask to be normal"

"This isn't normal Lucy. Nobody is normal. Or prefect. We're all strange.. Different. All in our own ways."

I sat there. Slient. Both of us stared at the ground.

"Lissana left now. She disappeared. Supposedly she transferred to a different school"

I breathed out. My knees were starting to hurt now, and dirty.

"Lucy."

I looked up at him.

"I like you."

…

Done this chapter. Oh my god Its 3 am. I have to be on the bus at 7 XD. Oh well. I'm used to it.

Please review and enjoy!


	12. Leaving the past behind

**Lucy pov**

I sat there frozen. "You.. Do?" He nodded. I kept staring at him. His eyes were closed tightly and his hands were clutched. I felt like I was

"Then.. Why.. Did you abandon me?" He opened his eyes and stared at me. "I liked you… ever since.. And you…" I croaked out. I put a hand over my mouth. "Lucy.." I kept staring at the ground. The gray concrete was cold when my hand touched it.

"I can't.."

"What?"

"I can't.. Do this…" I stood up. "You.. I can't forgive you.." He stood up as well. He towered over me when he stood in front of me. "I won't forgive you" I say. I stepped back.

"Lucy?" He said. "Now that I'm gone you want me?!" I say. "Lucy please" I felt so angry, for no reason. "No natsu don't try and make me forgive you!" I seen him frown.

"I can't believe.. I liked you." I say. He looked like he was slapped. "I can't believe I fell for you.." I felt the lump in my throat come up. The tears were daring to come up.

"I'm not going to fall for your lies anymore.." I barely got out. "I can't keep doing this! I'm so sick of crying over you! Over lissana! over me!" I swallowed.

"It was a mistake natsu. When I said I liked you"

His face was dull. Not showing any emotion.

"I didn't mean for this to happen. It.. Slipped out of my mouth.. I just wanted to forget about you."

I looked at him, his face was grim. And his head was lowered looking at his feet.

I turned on my heel. "Natsu." I looked up at the sky. It was still cloudy out, it looked so gray and dull.

"Next time I see you, I won't be crying."

I breathed out. I started walking. I didn't look back, I didn't want to look back. I didn't want to see his face. I didn't want to feel the guilt, I shouldn't be the one feeling guilty.

It should be everyone else but me.

…

"Hey Lucy?" Levy said.

"What?"

"Who's this.. Natsu dragneel? I seen him once before.. Remember at the hospital?"

I nodded.

"He's… just some guy from my old school."

Levy made her mouth in the shape of an 'o' she smiled and continued working. I sighed.

 **Natsu pov**

"Hey natsu? Are you okay man you don't look so great"

I looked in the mirror in the locker room. I had bags under my eyes and I could see my cheek bones.

"I'm fine. Just lack of sleep I guess"

He nodded and walked away. I kept staring at my self. I looked pathetic. A coward. A mistake in Lucy's life, that's what I was.

My skin was a yellowish now. I couldn't sleep. Many reason why, and Lucy was one of them.

I rubbed my eyes and walked away. I couldn't afford looking at my self all day..

I didn't eat lunch. I felt like puking if I did. Was this what they called depression?

I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking of everything again. Lissana… Lucy… everyone I disappointed. Was I really a mistake in Lucy's life? I was… I hate my self for that.

And how could lissana just leave like that?

I can't forgive her either… I can't forgive my self either.. Why did I leave Lucy? What was I thinking? Wasn't she the one always on my mind? What happened?

I kept thinking. It made my head hurt. But they kept repeating in my head. Lucy was still on repeat. She always was. I felt my head spinning.

I almost went to see Lucy today. I didn't. After all she wanted to forget about me.

Does.. That mean… I forget about her too?..

…

 **Lucy pov**

I played with erza in gym. At least this time it wasn't volley ball. We played badminton instead.

I hit the birdie and it went flying to erza. She hit it next and it came back to me.

We kept playing. At the end I was sweating. I never actually played gym up until now. I smiled.

"Hey Lucy.. Which highschool do you plan on going to?"

I started there and thought. The name popped up into my head.

"I think it was… fairy tail? Yeah fairy tail. I plan on going there for high school"

"Really? That's great news Lucy! I'm going there as well!" Levy squeeled. I smiled. I turned to erza who was calmly eating her lunch.

"Erza?"

"My parents are trying to get me into there too. They have great sport courses there"

Happiness filled me. That's great! At least I have some people to talk to.

"That's amazing. Everything is falling into place isn't it" levy said. I grinned. "It sure is.." I looked around us. Thank god.

"What about natsu?" Levy said. Me and erza froze. I turned my head and looked at her. She had the same look as levy. Except erza gave me the deadly look. The one telling me I shouldn't even bother with him.

"I don't plan on doing anything related to him."

"Why is that?" I closed my eyes. "Because. All he was is some guy I knew from my last school"

"Oh yeah.."

Erza came to my house this time. She wanted to talk to me. I shut the door when we entered my room.

"So what do you plan on doing with natsu?"

"Nothing. I don't even want to bother with him any more. Like I said, he's just some guy I knew in my old school"

She stared at me.

"I don't want to bother with the past anymore. I want to leave it all behind. I want to start fresh for once. To forget about lissana and natsu with everyone else. I'm only bringing you,levy, and jellal with me"

"What happened to lissana anyway?"

"My dad sued her.. I guess. I don't really know what happened. I was just questioned by the lawyer remember? At the hospital." She nodded and sat on the floor. I threw my bag to the side somewhere and laid on the bed.

I sighed. I heard erza grumbling. "What is it now?" I say. She stood up and looked at me. "Lissana deserves more than being sued.." I sat up.

"I can say yes to that…"

I yawned. I was so sleepy. Erza stayed till 11 since jellal was late picking her up. I didn't go to bed till 1 am. Since I still had homework and we didn't even bother studying.

Levy had to cancel. She had a date or something with a guy. She said it was 'just a game practice'. I smiled.

I haven't seen natsu since… I'm glad. It was true, what I said to erza. I did want to start fresh. I wanted to forget about him, lissana and everyone else with them. I didn't want to remember something like that.

I know I won't be able to forget it. Not ever. But I just wanted to leave it behind and move on.

I want to start fresh.

…

Oh god I'm so sorry I don't get this in earlier. I was so busy with school and other junk. Yeah.

BUT I CANT BELIEVE IT. IM GETTING THE AMAZING BOOK IS NOT ON FIRE FOR MY BIRTHDAY I CANT BREATH. I ordered it today. Im just happy right now I'm literally bursting at the seams.

Please review and enjoy!


	13. The count down

**Lucy pov**

"I can't wait!" Levy squeeled as we stood in gym. Erza threw the dodge ball across the room, hitting some guy to the ground.

"For what?" I say. She smiled. "Highschool of course!" She put her arms up. "Really? Its just more work to me.." Erza breathes out. "Same." I put my hand up. "Come one guys it's highschool. We'll have fun I know it!" I sighed.

"Oi Lucy look out!" I looked forward. A dodgeball came flying towards me. I ducked and smacked the wall. I turned and looked at it, then at the person who threw it.

Sting eucliffe.

He gave me a toothy grin and scratched his head. "Sting!" I say. He smiled nervously and backed away. "Oops" I threw a dodge ball at him, hitting his face and sending him to the ground.

"What the hell Lucy?!" He sat up and held his head. I laughed at him. Erza threw one at me and sting. I felt the pain go through me. "Erza?" I say. She frowned. "This is a game, not some lover field" she crossed her arms.

I blushed. Levy laughed at us. Sting got up and started arguing at erza. I smiled.

I yawned and put my head on the table. My stomach growled. "I'm so hungry" I complained. Erza chewed her food. "Why didn't you bring money or lunch? You have plenty of money" I put my head up. "I don't like using my wealth." Erza and levy stared at me blankly.

"Then what do you use it for?"

"Hey Lucy. What's wrong?" Sting asks me. "Oh god. What do you want?" I say. He looked hurt, "nothing geez.." He sat down with beside me. We all stared at him. He started eating. "What are you doing?" I say.

"Eating" he said with a mouthful of food. I sighed and put my head down again. "Here" he said and poked me. I sat up and looked at him. He handed me a peice of his lunch.

"You're making me feel depressed. So eat it" I grabbed it. And stared at it. Sting seemed to notice and said "I didn't poison it or anything if you're wondering" I took a bite of it.

The Bell rang and everyone finished eating and went to their classes.

The rest of the day I just wanted to go home.

I walked outside and shivered under the coldness. I stepped down the stairs and started heading home. "Bye Lucy!" I heard sting tell. I turned around. He waved in the distance, heading the other direction.

I waved slowly and starting walking home.

…

 **Natsu pov**

"God. I can't wait for highschool" loke says as he stretched his arms out. "Why is everybody excited for high school?" I ask. Bixslow patted my back "girls of course" he wrapped his arm around my head. He smiled slyly and gave me a thumbs up.

"As if you'd get a girl helmet head" I pushed him away and smiled. "I'm hoping to go to blue Pegasus for high school" hibiki says and smiles.

"Of course you would pretty boy" hibiki smiled "natsu you should come with me, it's practically an all boys school since barely any girls go there, since you're scared of girls" he laughed.

"What about you natsu? Where do you plan on going?" Lyon asked me. I shrugged and leaned on the wall.

"Fairy tail"

"You okay natsu?" Gray asked me. I nodded. "Yeah why?" He rolled his shoulders. "You've been so quiet lately.." I smiled at him. "Yeah I am. Don't have to worry about me ice princess" I nudged him.

I was now. I knew that. I think it was just… regret and guilt. I looked at my feet as they walked me home. Gray was right after all,I deserve to rot in guilt.

And I was stuck in the rot.

 **Lucy pov**

Depression sucked. It was so horrible. But I was getting through it. Or at least trying.

I looked at the calendar, it was early January. Only a couple months till the count down to highschool. And to be honest, I can't wait.

I wanted to leave the past behind, I know this isn't my only chance, but I want to do it as soon as possible. I didn't want to worry about what happened then.

I was excited too. Most of the people I know are going to fairy tail, I was just worried about erza and levy not coming. I sighed in relief.

"Hey Lucy" I looked beside me. Sting smiled and waved. I waved back. "What are you here?" He stopped and gave me a dull look. "I was just saying hello." I giggled a bit, he looked at me.

"I'm sorry. It's just.. We never really talk" he walked beside me again. "Well you're new here that's why." He grinned and put his arms in the air.

"I came here months ago."

"Oh." I continued walking to my locker. He stood there watching me. I looked at him, he looked back at me and grinned. I flinched and grabbed my books.

I laid on my bed. Trying to sleep, but I couldn't. So I lay there awake in my bed. The room was dark and the only light was coming from window.

I turned on to my side.

"Well Luce. You don't have to push me away"

Yeah… right..

I sighed. I closed my eyes finally. But I still couldn't sleep. Another sleepless night. I hated nights like this, these ones have me thinking too much. It never failed.

I hugged my self and eventually went to sleep.

It was June now. I felt the heat on my skin as I sat on the bench outside of school with erza. The tree above us gave us some shade and coolness.

It was now the count down to highschool. I felt the bubbly excitement in my stomach already. I smiled. The wind blew through my hair.

"Oh god" I say to erza. "Highschool" she looked at me, I looked at her. "Yeah.." I smiled. "I was so worried you'd go to a different school, same with levy" she smiled warmly.

"We'd still see each other, plus as if I could leave you alone. I promised I wouldn't let you get hurt. And I'm going to keep that promise."

"Thanks erza.. Same with me, I'll never let you get hurt either."

I looked ahead and stared at the scenery. Watching the trees rustle in the breeze.

I closed my eyes.

…

Summer break. I stretched my arms as I laid on my bed. The music played in the background, melodies in the air. I put my book down beside me.

Finally. After months of waiting the time would come to when I could start a new page. I would no longer be the depressed little girl everyone knew, I didn't want to be her anymore. I didn't want to cry anymore. I didn't want to be sad.

t

Like, _actually_ happy. Not for a few seconds happy. Just, happy. I didn't want to fake a smile anymore. I want to smile brightly.

I sat in my room staring at my school uniform. 2 weeks until the first day of school. The school was far, like far. A drive would be even longer now, it was on the other side of the city.

I tried it on. I looked at my self in the mirror. It was a good fit. I smiled. It smelt new even. I felt the excitement rising up.

"An.. Apartment?"

"Yes Lucy, so you could go to school easier."

"Are you sure? Because I don't mind it here."

"I just think it's convenient that's all. All expenses are paid of course. And you'd still be here in the city. You could say no if you'd like"

I thought about it. I wouldn't mind living by myself, the only down side is that everyone else would be farther away, dad, erza and jellal, levy…

"I'll.. Take it"

My dad smiled as he sat in his chair. "Good. You could move in by next week" he nodded and spinned his chair around so his back would face me. I got up and walked out.

Living by my self? That'd.. Be easy right? I was looking forward to it anyway. Now I could walk around my own house. Instead of avoiding areas of this house, like my mother's sun room.

I jumped on my bed excited. I couldn't wait. Things were finally beginning to be brighter. The light didn't seem so dim anymore.

"By your self?" I nodded as erza gave me a confused look, so did levy. "Really?" I nodded again. Levy smiled. "That's great lu-chan! But… don't you think its a but early?"

"A bit.. But still. The school would be walking distance."

"Didn't you do that last year? And the year before that?"

"Capricorn picked me up."

She nodded. "Well its great new then" she smiled. "But.. It's farther from you guys.." Levy waved her hands. "I don't mind riding a.. Dirty disgusting subway.. Since it'll be for you" I looked at erza "same here." She said.

I breathed out and smiled at them.

The light shined brighter.

…

And another late chapter -.-. I'm so sorry though. I had a mini writers block and I couldn't even write since I was so busy with studies. It's 3:05 am where I am, no sleep again (I'd rather write than sleep XD)

please review and enjoy!


	14. Orientation day

**Natsu pov**

I walked beside erza. Gray and levy stood on the other side of her. I sighed.

"You bastard. You better not try anything today. You too gray" I nodded. I knew what she meant. Wherever there was erza, there was Lucy.

"What did I do?!"

Erza said she wanted us close together. So if anything happened we wouldn't be around Lucy. I felt anxious. To see her. To know she's here, It made me feel joyous inside, I could feel the butterflies already.

"Man.. This is annoying" gray blew out. Erza elbowed him in the side. "Shut up snow cone" gray looked at me and gritted his teeth. "It should be just him, not me" spouts.

"Enough" erza says before we step inside. I looked around, the building was huge. So this was were I was going to spend the rest of my school years? I smiled.

"Oi erza" I heard a voice say. I look in front of us. A guy with blonde spiked hair waved his hand at us. Erza frowned. "Where's Lucy I thought you were with her" My chest tightened when I heard her name.

"Outside."

I turned around and ran outside the entrance. I didn't even think about going outside, and here I was. Heading out the door already.

I didn't care if I didn't tell them I was leaving, they didn't seem to notice either. I ran outside, she wasn't there. So I ran to the side of the building where there was an open area. My eyes scanned everywhere for a sign of her.

Bingo.

She stood there looking up at the sunny sky. Not noticing me. She was hot now. Her hair was now a nice shade of blonde, it was long and silky. Her legs were pale and smooth, not a single hair. Her skirt was a bit shorter and her chest was huge.

She wasn't that cute little girl with the dark circles under her eyes, even though they suited her at the time.

She wasn't any kind of hot you'd go after. She was the-i-want-you-in-my-pants hot. It made my head spin.

I never seen Lucy in a skirt before. Beside the school uniform when it was below her knees. It was now above the knees. And it didn't even make her look slutty. It made her even more beautiful, if that's even possible.

I could feel my self falling hard

She jumped and looked at me once she knew I was there. Her eyes were now a nice nutmeg color, not a dark brown. They shined in the sun light. I couldn't help but stare, I was mesmerized.

"Lucy?" I heard that guy say again. He ran besides Lucy. Lucy looked away and looked at him, disappointment sunk in. "Let's go inside now, erza wants to see you" he stared at me as he grabbed Lucy's hand. I felt a burning anger inside me.

"Okay.." She said in a quiet voice. She walked away with that guy inside. I stood there. I couldn't help but feel jealous. Why was he holding her hand? Were they?…

I walked inside. I seen stars and darkness. I felt the ground beneath me. "Erza!" I hear jellal say. "Where did you run off to?!" I opened my eyes. Erza stood infront of me angry. Her eyes were sharp, already stabbing me.

"Outside. Jeez erza you aren't my babysitter" I got up and held my face. I seen lucy staring at me. I widened my eyes. Her gaze showed nothing. Not even a single sign of sympathy.

"But you act like a kid" I kept looking at Lucy. Finally she looked away and turned around. She walked away. "Wait Lucy!" That guy says and walked beside her. The others went as well.

I shook my head a bit and started walking behind everyone.

Fuck.

...

 **Lucy pov**

Natsu looked at me. I felt angry and saddened. Why was he here? Of course. It's happening again. He's going to ruin everything again. Just when things were brighter.

I could feel the light dimming already.

I stood outside after everything was over. Waiting for everyone else. I felt my heart drop when I seen natsu running towards me.

He didn't say anything. But everytime I looked at him, he smiled. It made me even more pissed off.

"Like what you see?" He says when I look at him again. I scowl. "I see nothing." I say. He smirked. "Then why do you keep glancing over at me?" I crossed my arms. "So you won't get close to me" he took a step closer to me. I looked at him, he smiled.

"Please step away from my girlfriend" sting comes in between us. I push him away from me "You wish" I say. He smiled at me, but frowned at natsu. "Oh,I do wish" natsu kept staring at us both. It felt awkward and uncomfortable.

"Ready?" Erza says as jellal stood beside her. Levy behind the both. Gray walked beside them. Scowling and frowning, he was mad since erza had to babysit him and natsu together.

He noticed me staring, his expression changed "Long time no see Lucy" he looks at me and smiles. "Yeah.. It has" I smile back at him. "You guys met?" Erza ask. We both nod. "When.." I stop. I cover my mouth.

The flash backs came. I felt the vile taste in my mouth already. I could feel the fear I felt that day. When they burned my bag or when they threw those eggs at me.

I remember gray trying to defend me. I didn't really know what happened, I blanked out. I fainted. I was so scared.

"You okay?" I nod my head and smiled. "By the way gray, thanks" I say. I could tell he already knew what I meant. He winked and bowed.

Sting put a hand on my back. "I'm fine Sting" I say and start walking. "I'll be going now." I wave at the others. "Wait lucy" natsu says and grabs my arm.

"Can I walk you home?"

I looked towards erza. She clenched her fist. Gray and levy looked at me funny. I didn't know if I should say yes.

"I already am"

I look at sting. He walks towards me and stands beside me. I look at natsu again, his eyes softened and he let go. Sting wrapped his arms around me. I started walking with him.

Once we got around the corner I tried getting out of stings grasp. I wasn't his girlfriend, so why was he acting like this? Another player. I laughed at the thought.

So natsu was back. Great. Excellent. Right on time too. Right when things were getting better.

That fucker better not ruin it.

 **Natsu pov**

I stood there. Anger and jealous went through my body. I felt like punching that guy. Why was he so touchy towards Lucy? It should be.. No.. I couldn't. She's not mine to begin with.

Then why was I jealous? Oh right. I had a crush on her. Plus I'm already falling for her, again. I felt like mentally slapping my self.

This was the first time I seen a guy around her who was close to her like I was to her those years ago. I breathed in and out. I held my hand tight and let go.

"You idiot.." Erza says under her breath. I don't look at her, or answer her. I kept staring at the spot where they both stood and left.

"I'm leaving" I say and walk away. I felt so annoyed. Like a fly was bugging me. I kept thinking about it.

 _"I didn't mean for this to happen. It.. Slipped out of my mouth.. I just wanted to forget about you."_

She really did forget about me. After all this time. How come I couldn't forget her? Was I the only one with these feelings? Did.. She really mean.. For it not to happen?

I shouldn't think about it. It was my fault to begin with. Well.. Technically lissana's. But I knew I was the guilty one.

Rotting in the guilt.

...

 **Lucy pov**

I sat in my apartment. Thinking as usual. I looked at the screen. I wanted to write something. I felt the need to write something. But nothing came to mind. I started writing a while back. I just haven't in such a long time.

I used writing for something to say. Whatever I wanted to say but I couldn't, writing would help. And right now I had many things to say.

I stared at the screen.

 ** _"Years of saddness, emptiness, and nothing"_**

 _ **"This same dizzy feeling"**_

The sound of the keyboards is all I hear.

 _ **"why did you leave me?"**_

That one went to natsu.

 _ **"was I just some game to you? A toy to be played with?"**_

I held my breath.

 ** _"I'm sorry is said, but there is no forgiveness"_**

 _ **"tears were shed"**_

I held it.

 ** _"the feelings being reburied"_**

I froze and eventually stopped. I stared at the words. I put my finger on the back space, deleting the words. I let go when it became blank once again.

…

So busy.. Ahh.. Late chapter again. Ugh. I feel horrible for being late again -.-.

BUT IM SO HAPPY I GOT THE AMAZING BOOK IS NOT ON FIRE FOR MY BIRTHDAY (its on the 23rd of October ;)

Please review and enjoy!


	15. First day of school

**Natsu pov**

I leaned against the wall outside. I yawned. I was tired. And lazy, I just about didn't come to school. But of course. She was here. I had to.

I watched as people walked inside. All of them chatting with their friends, some alone with a dull face. I yawned again. Tears came to my eyes so I wiped them with my hand.

My heart skipped a beat. I seen a flash of blonde. It was Lucy of course. Her hair flowed in the breeze, it shined once it came into the sunlight. It turned golden almost.

She glanced at me. She looked away once she seen me. Her legs moved faster even. Like she was afraid of me. I smiled. And her face shifted. To the look of surprise.

She went inside. I blew out a slow breath. Fuck. What was happening to me? I know I like her, but still. What was with the chest tightening and other girly shit? Butterflies even. Annoying..

I shook my head from the thoughts and walked inside also. I was now stuck in a literal wave of people. All moving at the same speed, and it was hard to breath. People surrounded me.

"Flame head"

I hear gray say. I looked to the side. He waved and called me over. "Dude you're late." He slams the locker door shut and leans against it, looking at me. "I was just outside" I opened the locker beside his. I guess I'll take this locker.

I looked all over, looking for a sign of her.

None. So I went to my first class. I'd see her somewhere. I feel it.

 **Lucy pov**

First day of school. And it was great so far. No troubles. Some of the teachers were even nice to go easy on us today. So it was practically a free day. I even had a free period. After lunch.

I seen natsu the morning. He smiled at me. Which surprised me. His smile looked different then before. It was more of.. A warm smile. Not his big toothy grin from when we were younger.

I sat in class. It was history. Like from my younger years, I was still early. Only two other people sat in the room with me. The Bell rang. And everyone else came flooding in.

I seen a few people I knew from before come in. Gray full buster, gajeel redfox, natsu, and even Bacchus. I groaned. Another problem.

Natsu spotted me. I looked at him. He sat to the left two seats behind me. I sighed and started scribbling and doodling on my notebooks. Trying to ignore him.

Please. Please please please please let this class end already. It's getting harder to breath.

…

I kept on trying to avoid natsu. I didn't want to see him, not today. But I kept seeing him everywhere. It was like he was.. Hard to dodge. And right on time, I stopped when I seen him with gray and gajeel. They stood at the wall in the hallway.

I turned around once they looked at me. I felt nervous. Memories kept flooding back. The time when I was egg bombed. That, was traumatizing. It was my fault. I could've ran away. But I didn't. Oh god. I'm such a coward.

I partially ran. I didn't want to deal with this. Not today at least. I wanted things to go according to plan. I breathed out. I just.. Needed to calm down.

Breath.

 **Natsu pov**

I stood here with gray and gajeel. There was nothing else to do. "Hey natsu. Here comes your girl" I looked at him, then in front of me. She stood there. Her brown eyes wide. Staring at the three of us. It was like she seen a ghost.

I smiled. But she was already turning around and walking away. Fast. I sighed. "I heard she was a virgin" gray nudged me. I look at him. "I mean she is a virgin" he smirked at me.

"You're a pig" I push him. He was. He was what you call… a fuck boy. Girls always cling to him. Like juvia lockser. She has been since we were young. But he always takes her as an annoying brat. I always felt bad for her.

"Not my fault I can actually get the ladies" I sure as hell didn't get the ladies. "Yeah but you don't keep them" gajeel says. "I have a wonderful and adorable girlfriend. You can't ever hold a relationship" gray frowned.

"Natsu didn't yet either" they both look at me. "I'm waiting. For the right girl" I didn't want to say Lucy's name. "And that girl is Lucy." Gray smirked at me. I stayed quiet. "You mean that blonde chick?" Gray nodded.

"He's been crushing on her for awhile now." He was now frowning at me. "He doesn't deserve her though." I looked away from them. But I knew they were still looking at me.

"A lot of shit went down. Something I can't explain" gray kept talking as if I want even there. "Anyway. You're such a man whore. Girls don't like that. They like guys who are gentle men" gray laughed.

"I'm not trying to get tied down. I wanna live, experiment if you want to put it that way. Before I get into a relationship" I looked at him and lifted a brow. "So you're living by sleeping with women?" He raised his hand, meaning stop.

"The ladies like it" he smiled smugly.

I sat in my room at my desk. Looking at the computer screen. Lately I've been reading. A lot. Maybe because it reminded me of her. Oh god. Please don't tell me I'm obsessed with her.

I was tired. But I wanted to stay up a bit longer. I didn't want to sleep. I yawned and scrolled down the screen on the laptop. Looking through blogs and such. I felt so tired of school already. I was lucky it was an easy day today.

I couldn't handle it. I shut down the laptop and shut off the lamp. I crawled under the sheets and into my bed. I closed my eyes. And the memories came flooding back like a tidal wave.

I wondered. What would happen if lissana was still here. Would I be with her? What would happen if I never met her. It would've been better. Less everything. I wouldn't be in this place.

What would happen if I never came to that school? Where would I be now? Would I still have met Lucy? I wish I never went there.. So I could at least help Lucy before everything happened. Instead of breaking her heart and ripping our friendship.

I fell asleep.

 **Lucy pov**

I woke up. I felt scared almost. I forgot where I was. It wasn't until it finally transferred in my head that I was now living alone. My dad must be crazy, letting me live alone. I like it though. It's peaceful.

I got up and got showered and ready. I put on my uniform and ate breakfast. I was too early so I had time to waste. I spent that time reading, I was almost finished anyway.

I looked at the time after I was done, and I was out the door.

I sat on the subway. It felt so gross. And disgusting. Such as life. I put my head back and closed my eyes. They felt heavy. I shouldn't sleep though. I might miss my stop.

Only for a second. Then I'll stay up.

"..y?...ucy?… Lucy?" I fluttered my eyes open. My eyes adjusted. I looked at the person in front of me. All I seen was pink and onyx eyes. He stared at me. The subway stopped. I looked at the people flooding out.

"You're going to miss your stop" he smiled at me. I grumbled at him and sat up straight. I got up and rushed out. Natsu followed behind me. "You shouldn't sleep on a subway." I grumbled again. I was still sleepy. I walked faster. But he kept up.

"No thanks?" He asks me. I stop and turn around and face him. He just about ran into me. "Thanks" he smiled again. I walked away. But he continued to follow me.

I looked at him. He smiled. I looked away. Why was he so chirpy? I was even walking my fastest, and he acted as if it was nothing and kept up. Damn tall people.

I could feel his eyes on me. It didn't creep me out. I felt calm. Actually. But nervous. Nervous as hell. How could he act like that after what all went down? What we- I said.

He grabbed my arm. And dragged me along with him. Electric socks went up my arm, the area he's touching. "Hurry up if you don't want to be late!" He says as he runs. I could barely even keep up.

We ran down the street. People passing by gave us strange looks. I looked at him. His hair flowed through the wind. I breathed out. What the hell was happening?!

I panted as I sweated. So did natsu. I propped my self against the wall, tired. I looked at the time. We were on time. Even if I didn't rush I would've made it. I stared at natsu. He looked at me, and grinned. I pouted.

"You idiot" I say and stand up properly. "Yes?" He says and wipes the sweat off his forehead. "Why did you do that?!" I look up at him. "Why not?" I felt angry and frustrated. Why was he acting so casual towards me?

"You should be thanking me" he smiled down at me. "I already did!" He chuckled a bit. His voice was deeper now. "It was fun, after all. We haven't seen each other in so long" I frowned at him.

"Don't be so happy around me." His smile faded. "I don't want anymore stunts like this. And don't try and act or be my friend" I kept frowning at him. But the edges of his mouth were trying not to smile.

"I'm serious" I kept staring at him. "Brighten up a bit. Aren't you happy to see me?" He asked me. "No I'm not. And now I'm mad since I'm tired from running 6 blocks straight." I walked away, I ignored the fact he was still staring at me.

Why was he so happy? I thought it would be dramatic and sad the next time we met. But he's acting as if he's my best friend, like nothing ever happened. Why was he like this?

It suddenly became harder to breath.

...

Is anybody else sad that October is almost over? Like where did it go?

Please review and enjoy!


	16. And he lives up the street

**Natsu pov**

I watched as Lucy walked away. I smiled. She's still the same as ever. Well I really shouldn't have done that. Now she's mad at me, technically she was before. I made it worse.

She stomped away into the distance, finally disappearing around the corner. Once she left, I turned around and headed to my locker. I looked at the time. She was right, we would've been on time even if we did walk.

I sighed heavily. I agreed with Lucy, I thought our next meeting would be dramatic, crying would be involved. Unless you count orientation day where I practically stared her down.

I didn't mean to drag her to school with me. But I had the urge to. I always get these moment where I don't even have control my body. And this was one of those moments.

I headed to class. The only classes I had with Lucy were English, gym, and history. I was lucky I had English first. I sat down in the back again. And I pulled out my sketch book, I use it to doodle. Doodle was now soothing to me I guess.

For the rest of class I didn't bother looking up, I just stayed to my drawings.

 **Lucy pov**

I sat on the side lines with levy. It was gym and I'd rather sit here than play. I'm guessing levy does too since she's still sitting here with me. Erza is out on the court playing.

I held my knees. I watched as everyone play basketball, the sound of their shoes squeaking as they ran and jumped. I watched as natsu dunked it. He winked at me and continued playing.

I scoffed. But levy giggled and nudged at me. I frowned and hugged my knees tighter.

I kept catching natsu glancing at me, and when our eyes met he always smiled. Why was he still acting like this? Like my friend? It bothered me. After almost 1-2 years of not seeing him hes acting as if nothing ever happened.

I sighed and closed my eyes as I buried my head into them. Oh god. Why was he like this.

After school when I was walking to the station, natsu stopped me. "What?" I ask him. He smiled "can I walk with you?" I frown and ignore him. But he followed. "Are you still mad?" He asks me. But I stay quiet.

"Look I'm sorry for dragging you to school this morning if that'll make you feel better-"

"I already warned you natsu. I dont want you trying to become my friend, or thinking that we are" he stopped. So did I. The area between us got longer.

"I don't want to be your Friend. So please, stop it" I look at him. His eyes were warm, the corners of his mouth were daring to come up. "I'm serious!" I say. "I didn't say anything" I sighed and continued walking.

"Well whether you like it or not, I still have to walk with you." I looked at him again. And he smirked, as in too-bad-it-can't-work-on-me smirk. I clenched my fists and walked my fastest away from him.

On the subway we stood together. And when we got off we were still together. It annoyed me to no end. Finally when I thought I finally would be alone, he followed. Hands in his pockets with a half smile on his face.

I stopped at my apartment. "This is my place" I say to him. He looked at the building. "You moved?" He asked me. I nodded. "Why? You had such a nice place" I sighed in my pocket for my keys. "Just I did. Dad still has the mansion. As if he'd ever leave there" I found them.

"What why are you here?" I ask him before I could put the key into the door. "Just making sure you make it home safe." Again he smiled, I frowned at it.

"I live down the street by the way." He points at his house. But I'm not sure which one it is. "Oh" I say and opened the door. "Later Luce" he waved and started heading down the street.

My heart stopped when he said Luce. He hasn't called me that in so long. I slammed the door. I felt my chest tighten again. No Lucy. Don't. He'll only break your heart again.

I take off my shoes and head to my room. Again I slam the door. No body is here but me anyway. I plopped onto my bed. Natsu is still the same as ever, he just does what he wants. "Later Luce" I groaned, annoyed.

And he lives down the street?!

…

 **Natsu pov**

I opened the door to my house and shut it once I entered. "I'm home" I say. Nobody would be back yet. Wendy, my sister was at a friends house, my dad was at work. Happy walked in and purred. I yawned as I walked up the stairs.

I fell onto my bed and closed my eyes. Lucy lived up the street now? Good, now she won't be so lonely in a big mansion. I remember what she said, that she only liked to go around some places in the house, she avoided the rest.

 _"Why would you avoid some places?"_

 _She smiled. "Because that's where my mom usually was" I stared at her. Her eyes looked up at the sky. "I always avoid her and my dad's room, her powder room, the sun room, and even a part of the garden"_

 _"What happens to your mom?" Her smile faded. Her eyes looked watery. "She.. Passed away when I was younger, around 5-3. I never asked since its still hard on my dad" she tried smiling again. But frowned._

 _"I don't even know how she died. But I remember her. She was always cheerful. And she was so beautiful, her hair was always in curls, and she never wore a drop of makeup."_

 _"I never really had a mother either. She died when I was younger. When my sister was born" she looked at me, and I looked at her. "We're the same then" she smiled. "Yeah…"_

I turned onto my side. Now a days, she won't smile at me anymore. No matter how hard I try. But I'll keep trying. For as long as it takes. I'll fix her smile. I yawn again. I was so tired.

I closed my eyes. And eventually went to sleep.

 **Lucy pov**

A week later he was back. I walked out my door step and walked to school. "Hey" I jump scared and just about scream. I turn around and look at natsu. He leaned against the wall, like he was posing for a picture.

He smiled at me, and I breathed out. "Holy shit you scared me natsu" he laughed a bit. "Oops" he walked up to me. I stepped back a bit. "Let's walk together" he offers me his hand. I stare at it, then at him. He takes the hint and lowers his hand.

"Look natsu. I told you. I don't want anything to do with you"

"No. You said you didn't want to be my friend. And I'm asking as… an acquaintance." He looked down at me. "An acquaintance?" He nodded. I walked away. Ignoring him. Geez. Can't he get it?

I could hear him behind me. I sighed. "Natsu." I kept walking, waiting for him to answer me. "What" he said. "Stop it" I say. "Hey I have to get to school too." I turned my head to look at him. He was walking with his eyes closed, arms behind his head.

On the subway he sat with me. And kept walking with me. As much as I like for him to go somewhere else other than here, he also had to get to school. And which that meant he was going to be with me.

For the rest of high school.

We approached the school. Sting came running to me. "Lucy!" He called out. I waved at him. "Finally! I was getting worried there" he smiled at me. But glared at natsu. "You don't have to worry about me" he kept staring at natsu.

"Let's go" he said in a demanding voice. He put his arm around me. And pulled me away. I hated it when he did this. I pushed him off me. "Sting don't" I tell him. "Don't what?" He smirked and pulled me even closer. "Get off me, I can walk on my own." I try and tell him.

"Dude. Get off her"

We both turn around to see natsu. Still here surprisingly. He stared at sting, waiting for him to get off me. He pulled away. I stepped away from the both of them. "What's your problem?" Sting asked, with that same voice from earlier.

"Nothing, just protecting the lady" he smiled. "That all" natsu waved and walked beside me. He pushed me along. And I let him. We left sting behind us and went inside, I could feel natsu's hand on my back as he pulled me away.

I stayed quiet once we were inside. His hand was still behind my back as we walked. "Still no thanks?" He asks me. I slap his hand away. " I could've handled that myself" I frown. "What's his problem anyway?" I shrugged my shoulders.

"He's always like that. Clinging to me and other stuff like that" he scoffs. "What?" I ask him. "Nothing. Just that…" I kept staring at him. He looked at me and then turned away. "Never mind" he walked away. Leaving me confused.

"Thanks.." I whisper to myself.

…

I stood outside. The brisk air was nice. And I needed s break from the crowds and waves of people. It was too much sometimes.

I breathed in the crisp air. Enjoying the moment to my self. I sat down and leaned my back against the wall. I closed my eyes. I could hear the wind in my ears.

"Do you still cry?"

I open them again. Recognizing the voice. I turn my head and see him standing there. He smiled. I frowned at him. But he continued to smile. "No." I say. And get up. But he waves his hands, telling me not to get up.

"So you come here too?" He asks me. "Just now. I.. Needed a break" he tilts his head slightly. "This brings back memories" his eyes scan the place, then me. "Memories?" I say. He nodded.

"Yeah. Remember? Like at the old school, its where we first met"

"But this isn't the old school"

"I know, but it was at the side of the building wasn't it?"

He kept looking at me. I looked at the wall. Trying to ignore his face, and eye's. "You know, this seems nice" he sat down beside me. He pats the spot next to his. I stare at it for a moment, then sit down. "Its mostly bad memories for me." I say. His eyes looked at me.

"Do.. You still wish to forget about them?" I sighed. I don't really know anymore to be honest. I stay quiet for a second. The air seemed to get even more cold.

"No."

He widened his eyes a bit. "If I didn't have those memories, then I wouldn't become the person I am today" I put my head back. "So the answer is no."

"Officially?"

"Let's not get that serious"

He chuckled a bit. "I wish to erase your memories some days. Especially of me." I look at him, and his head is help up, looking up at the clouds above us. "I.. caused you so much pain." He smiled a bit. But it wasn't the one he always gave me.

"I can't believe I was so dumb back then. I bet I still am"

"No you're not"

His eyes seemed warm. As they stared into mine. "It was partially… my fault" he shook his head. "It never was Lucy. So stop saying that" I sigh.

"I'm sorry luce.. I truly am" I lowered my head. "Gray told me I would always live with regret, he said for me to rot in the guilt." He paused and looked at me. I stared into his.

"And you know what?"

I stayed quiet. And the air around us went silent. Not a thing to be heard. Everything went still.

"I'm swimming in it."

He gave me another smile. "It's okay" he tells me. Yet I should be the one telling him that. "I deserve this. So don't worry about me" he puts his hand on my head and rubs it. "Natsu." I say and he keeps looking at me.

"I'm sorry luce. I.. Ruined everything."

I stand up and dust my self off. "You're right" I say. "You did wreck it. And in that process, you broke my heart. And even my smile." He stayed quiet, listening to every word I say. "Lissana.. And you…" I look at him and his head is held low. So his eyes can't see mine.

"Do you even know what lissana did to me?"

He looked up at me. I lifted up my shirt. His expression changed. There was a small scar on my stomach. "This." I say and pull my shirt down again. He frowned. "And that's not even half" I smile at him, and his face goes soft.

"You weren't even there for half of it"

He stood up and looked down at me. We stared at each other. Not breaking it. He was the first to break it by bending down and hugging me. I felt my eyes go wide. He squeezed me and held me tight.

"I'm sorry" he says in my ear. I breath out. "Luce, I'm sorry for ever hurting you. I'm sorry for breaking your heart, and your smile. I'm sorry for ever doing anything to you. I'm sorry" he kept saying that repeatedly.

I hugged him back, for some strange reason. I held him tight. And he held me tight. I let go. And so did he. "Natsu.." I look at him. He smiled.

"I'll make it up to you. I'll fix the pieces. I'll make it up to you. I swear on it Lucy."

"And Lucy?"

I kept looking at him. Waiting for him to say what ever he was about to say.

 _"I'll make it so you could forgive me"_

…

Wow this was longer than I expected it to be.

Please review and enjoy!


	17. Only a phone call away

**Lucy pov**

"Your… promise?"

He nodded. And gave me another warm smile.

I felt angry for some reason. But happy. A good happy. Mixed with the anger I had at him for years. I still never really got it out.

"What.. Happens.. If I don't forgive you"

He shrugged his shoulders. "Anything" he put his hands in his pockets. "I just want you to be happy." I kept listening to him as he went on. "Whatever it takes. I want you to be happy" I looked at the ground.

"Then.. Why didn't you do that before?"

I didn't bother looking up. I didn't want to look at him. "The me before would've been happy to hear that, the thing is is that I'm not the person I was before." I stared my feet next. Trying to concentrate on everything else but him.

"I-"

"Before I wanted to hear those words so bad. But now I feel so mad I can't even… just.. Ugh!" I say frustrated. "You're still so selfish!" I look up at him now. And he's not smiling anymore. "You're still doing this for yourself. To make you feel better about yourself." His eyes went dark a bit.

"It's still as long as you're happy.. Right?" I say. And I could see his hand clench. And his shoulders went tense. "You're wrong" he says. "Then why do I still feel like you're doing it for yourself?" He went quiet again.

"I don't care about the promise. I'm happy. Just not around you." I turned on my heel, I stood there. My back facing him. I breath out a bit. "You can keep your promise, or not. It's your choice" I walked away.

I didn't care anymore. I didn't want him in my life anymore. I was so sick of this. This ugly feeling. And it was always him causing it. And I really don't care about that promise.

I am happy. I was happy, before he came. The light was about to be brighter, brighter than before.

The light became dim.

 **Natsu pov**

I stood there again. I didn't breath until she left. I blew out and breathed in again. How was I still selfish? Was.. I really like that to her? I spoke the truth. I wanted her to be happy. I'll drown in this regret if I have to. I'm already rotting in it anyway. What do I have to lose?

I'll prove it to her. I'll prove that I'm not the slefish boy she knew. I'll make it up to her. I promise. Even if its the last thing I do.

I kick at the ground. I wait a few seconds before I leave.

 **Lucy pov**

I sat at lunch. Picking at my food. I'm guessing erza or some one noticed because they all went quiet. I stopped and looked up. Erza is staring at me, so is levy and sting. Gajeel sat beside levy. So I looked down again.

"You okay?" Sting asks me. I nodded and look up at him. "Of course. Why?" I ask him. He frowned a bit "nothing.. It's just you've been like that for 2 days now" I sighed. "Look Lucy if you're having problems just tell-"

"Tell you. I know. But I'm not having problems. It's just.. I feel.. Sick" I lie to her. I didn't want them worrying about me. I smile. "I'm okay though. I'll live" I smile at erza now. And she gives me a half hearted smile.

After lunch I wait to go home. I just wanted to end today already.

I walked down the street as I went home. I felt lonely now. Since natsu followed me usually. But I haven't heard from him in 2 days. The last time I seen him was beside the school, and I got mad.

I take a mental note: never go to the side of school buildings, problems always lie there.

I sigh. Geez. I hate this feeling. I clutch the straps of my bag and continued walking.

I stopped at my door. And turned my head. I looked down at the street. And I seen his house. It seemed quite. I shake my head and look for my house keys.

"Lucy?" I turn my head and look at natsu. He stood there looking at me. I breathed out. "What are you doing here?" I ask him. "Walking you to school, what else" he stepped up and stood beside me. "Where were you all this time?" I ask him. He smiles smugly. And bends down to me so his face is close to mine.

"Were you actually worried about me?" He lifted his eyebrows. "No." I walk away from him. But he caught up quickly. "Then why did you ask?" I shrugged my shoulders. "Because. Usually you bug me, like now" he laughed a bit.

"You care"

"No I don't. I haven't all this time, why should I care now?" He went quiet. "Because. I'm-" I stop him. "I don't want to hear it right now" I look up at him. He just closed his eyes and looked away. And we started walking in complete silence.

…

"Lu-chan?"

I looked up. I was in the library with levy and my friend juvia. I met juvia on the first day of school, she was pretty nice. So far I know she's grays girlfriend, and she likes to swim.

"Are you okay?" She asks me. I look at her strangley. "Yeah. Why'd you ask?" They both look at each other. "Well its just.. You've been hanging around natsu lately. Erza told me to warn you about him and-"

"I'm alright. And I don't need a warning" juvia looked at us confused. "Juvia wants to know about natsu and Lucy" I sigh. "He's just.. Some guy I knew from this old school of mine. Nothing else." I continued reading again.

"Really?" Levy asked me. I looked up at her. I nodded and went back to reading. "Alright.." She whispered again. Eventually she also went back to reading.

 **Levy pov**

I didn't believe Lucy. I didn't mean to be rude, or even ask. But it pondered in my head all day, and I couldn't get it out.

I sat beside gajeel. He had is eyes closed. I sighed and looked down at my lap. "Shrimp" he said. I looked up at him and he was facing me. "Tell me" I sigh again. "No its alright." I tell him. But he keeps staring.

"Who's this natsu guy?"

He froze for a second. Then he crossed his arms. "That pink haired dumb ass? He's just some guy from-" I grumbled. "I can tell he isn't some 'guy from my old school' or 'a nobody'" I pout. I watched him, his expression changed and he sighed heavily.

"I've known him awhile now."

My ears were now wide and open. He started talking about how he met him and why he stuck with him over the years. "And Lucy?" I ask him. "How does he know Lucy?" He looked away from me. His shoulders tensed.

"That's a long, dreadful story"

He kept looking away from me. I poked him. But he didn't budge. "Tell me" I ask him, silent. "Please?" I ask again. I lean over him and look at him in the face. He groaned. "Fine! But don't blame me of you cry"

It'll make me cry?!

 **Lucy pov**

I walked down the street. Cars fly by me as I breathed in the night air. I was walking back from the book store. I needed to get a new book again.

I looked at the people walking by. I smiled at a few. I dug into my bag and grabbed the book. I stared at the cover as I walked, not looking where I was going.

"Yes Mira I'll be there in a sec"

I stopped. I felt my knees go weak. I looked up. And I felt like throwing up. Lissana stood there on the phone. She smiled and laughed as she talked. What should I do? What.. Am I supposed to do? I

Her eyes met mine once she noticed me. I covered my mouth as I dropped the book. Her blue eyes went wide, so did mine. She put the phone down. I stepped a few steps back.

"L-lucy?"

I felt my vision go blurry once she called out to me. I turned around and started running. As fast as I could go. I felt my head starting to spin. I just about crashed into my door before I opened it.

I walked into my room. And everything came at me at once. Flash backs. I covered my mouth as I staggered into the room. I felt like crying once I thought about lissana. I held my stomach.

I could feel her kicking me almost. Just thinking about it. I felt powerless. Weak. Like I was in a dark small room when I thought of her. I sat myself down beside the bed. Shit…

I sat there. Staring at the wall. The tears came to my face. I touched my face. It was wet. I started to sob. I bended my knees and grabbed them and hugged them for dear life. Like I was about to disappear.

I heard the door bell. I ignored it. Soon the front door opened.

"Lucy?" My heart stopped once I recognized his voice. I sat there silent, but I was still sobbing. "Lucy?!" I heard natsu saying as he looked in all the rooms. He opened the door. And his face dropped. He ran to my side. I cried even harder.

"Luce what's wrong?!" He looked at me from head to toe. I felt my hand grab onto his arm. By this time I was crying hysterically. I couldn't stop. And I felt like throwing up.

"It's alright Luce" he kept telling me. I knew it wasn't. It didn't feel like it was. "Just let it out" he held my tight. Rocking me back and forth as held me, trying to console me. "It's okay." He kept saying in my ear.

For once I felt safe.

Once I stopped crying I kept my face hidden in my knees still. He was still hugging me. I could feel his warmth.

"Luce tell me what's wrong" he asked me. I wiped my face and lifted my head. "I don't know.. It's just.. Everything again." His grip went tighter. "I was thinking about lissana again." I say and look at him. His eyes seemed dark again. "Well don't." He wiped my face. "Don't think about her" I look away.

"It's just.. I seen her. I seen lissana. She looked at me and-" He sighed. "Stop Lucy. Slow down." He tells me. I breath in. "I was walking.. Back from the book store. And she was there. She called my name and looked at me.. I-I ran." He squeezed me again.

"That fucking bitch"

I looked at him. "Where did she go?" He asks me. I sighed and pulled on his sweater. "Fuck.." He said under his breath. "Don't natsu." I tell him. "No Luce I will. She needs to rot in this guilt. Just as I am. She needs to pay for what she did-" I pull in his sweater again.

"I know." He sighed. He pulled me closer to him. "Where's your phone" he asks me. "In the kitchen" he lets go of me and walks to the kitchen. I get up and follow him.

He grabbed it and dialed a number. "Wait what are you doing?" He put the phone up to his ear. "Calling erza" I tried grabbing the phone, but he kept moving and dodging me.

"Don't rat on me!" I say and hit him. "Ow! Jesus Luce stop! I need to tell her" he shushed me. I stood there, listening.

"Hey erza. It's natsu. What? No no. It's.. Lucy…. Yeah she's alright… she was crying…. I didn't do it!... What ever just get your ass here…. Okay… yes.. Later" he hung up the phone. I stared at him. He put his hand on his head.

"So?" I ask him. "She's coming over. She said for us to wait here." He walked over to the couch. He sat down and looked at me. I sighed and sat beside him.

"You didn't have to do that. I'll be fine" he scoffed. I rubbed my eyes, they're probably puffy now. "No you aren't fine, all thanks to that bitch lissana" I put my head back and groan.

"Natsu please don't do this" I tell him "no. I don't like that you're crying by yourself, what would've happened if I didn't come here?" I cross my arms together and pout. I face the other way.

"I'm fine. It was my fault. I should've confronted her. Call erza and tell her that" he sighed. He sat there. Staring at me. I grumbled and stomp my way to the phone and dial the number to her cell phone.

She yelled into my ear the entire time when she answered. After convincing her she stayed home. I hung up the phone and sighed in relief. I looked at natsu, who was staring at me.

"Is she coming?" He asks me. I shake my head "no she isn't now" he closed his eyes. I sat beside him again. Silence lurked around us. "Lucy.." I looked at him.

"It's my fault"

He whispers. He sat there with his arms crossed, facing me. "Stop it natsu" I tell him. He put his head down "please? It's my fault.. Really its-" I stopped. He sat there quiet and still. "I'm sorry" I say. "Don't be. There's nothing to be sorry about" he lifted his head up and smiled at me.

I rubbed my eyes again. "I should go. I'll be back in the morning though." He got up and walked to the door. He stood there for a second and walked up to me. "Don't worry about lissana. I'll take care of it" he walked out the door before I could say anything.

I sat in my spot. I sighed and put my head back again. I put my hands on my eyes. Oh god. What did I do. I rub my eyes again and stand up.

I sighed and yawned. I looked at the coffee table. A yellow sticky note was place there. Someone stuck it to the table. I picked it up and read it.

 _"I'm only a phone call away, or down the street. Don't be shy if you need anything_

 _-natsu"_

I looked on the back, his phone number was written there. I stared at it. I stuck it by the phone and walked into my room. Changed into pajamas, and laid in bed.

I turned onto my side and closed my eyes and fell asleep.

...

No more spoopy :(. Now I'm excited for Christmas, the count down is on XD

Please review and enjoy!


	18. Dinner

**Lucy pov**

Sometimes I wonder about everything. Life and death. Its funny how it works. You live for a long period of life, then bam! you're dead. Your mortality has run out. What are we supposed to do with our lives? No body gave us a plan, not even god him self. I guess that's his gift to us, life and how we want to live it. No plan no nothing.

What is our main goal? To have kids, or end up alone. To live a long life, or a short life. To be free and courageous, or over thinking and stay at home locked away from the real world.

If we have no purpose, then make a purpose. To live. That's really our goal in life, to spend it as we want. You can smoke, do drugs, whatever. You chose. It maybe unhealthy and I really don't recommend it, and i'm not saying to do that either. I'm saying its your life and you can choose how you want it to be. Be a superstar, be a sports player, doctor, journalist, or simply nothing. its your choice.

Id rather live my life to the fullest. Corny I know. But still. I want to do everything in life. The ones that give you a rush of adrenaline, the ones that make you feel warm, or simply no feeling at all. I want to experience as much as I can. Because in the after life, if there even is such a place. All we're going to do is be a ghost, or in heaven dancing with an angel, or down there. In hell, burning.

I don't really believe in hell. Because I was in it once already. I don't plan on going back either.

Either way, we have to live. I want to be happy in life. To smile brighter than everyone else.

Happiness is the key.

I sit beside natsu. Its lunch, ever since he caught me hes been beside me 24\7. I reminded me of when we first met. I picked at my food. He seemed to notice, and he nudged me. He looked at me. His eyes telling me to eat. But I don't. I simply don't feel hungry. He looked away and started eating his food. Taking in huge mouthfuls, one by one. I put my fork down and laid back a bit. "Lu-chan you shouldn't starve your self all the time. Its bad for you" Levy tells me as she sits in front of me. I looked at my food, and then back to her. "I had a big breakfast. So i'm not that hungry" I smiled so I could reassure her. She nodded and went back to her food.

For that entire time, I just talked. And let my food go to waste.

…

I stared into the distance. Thinking. Why the hell am I talking to natsu? I shouldn't even be bothered by him, lest interact with him. I shouldn't let him come into my life again. If so.. then why am I letting him so easily back in. Last time he did I was scarred for life, I'll never forget those moments in life. Natsu Dragneel. Why was he such a big part of my life now?

Technically he saved me, right? I mean he's right, I don't even know what would've happened if natsu didn't come. The thought scares me. Lissana scares me. Life scares me. It seems that almost everything scared me now a days.

What was wrong with me?

And what is happening to my plan? I had one, it doesn't seem to be going accordingly. I thought i'd forget everything as soon as I entered school. And people would see me different. Nothing has changed this past month. I sure as hell know I haven't, i'm still that weak little girl afraid of everyone and everything.

"You alright?" Natsu asks me as we walk side by side home. I shook my head "No. Not really" I tell him, this time I didn't lie. "Whats wrong" He stops and puts his arm in front of me, making me stop also. I shake my head again. "Nothing" I lied. "Then how come you said no?" He moved his arm and put his hand into his pockets. "Over thinking. I'm worried about my plan, about becoming 'fresh'" I shivered under the autumn cold. "Don't worry about things like that Luce, it'll wreck you" I sighed and looked away from him.

"I'm already wrecked. How can I get even more wrecked?"

"Luce you're not wrecked."

"Hows that?" I ask him. He stepped forward to me and leaned into my face. "You never used to smile, or laugh. Not even to erza, and all you had was erza back then" I stared into his onyx eyes. "You have so much friends that care about you, me, erza, levy. And you always smile, you never even notice" He finally stepped back, giving me some space. He gave me that warm smile.

"I'm still that weak little girl though, I'm still that victim" He shook his head no. "No you were never weak. You were the one who stood up to lissana, didn't you? You were always strong-" I clenched my fist, " I was never strong!" I tell him. "If I was strong I'd be over lissana. I'd be over everything! I only stood up because I was scared, scared of losing you. Scared for my own sake. Scared for everything" I stared at him, but he kept a straight face. "You were scared of losing me?" He asked me, I nodded. "Yes I was natsu, I was scared of losing one of my friends, you were one of the first to become my friend. So yes natsu I was scared. I was scared of us not being friends anymore" His eyes went low.

"I don't care about that anymore though" He looked down now "I'm so tired of this. This was one of the reasons why I wanted to become someone new, right when I got into High school" I shivered again. He looked at me, but since I was in an angry mood I looked away. I heard his jacket unzip and him walking towards me. He wrapped it around me. I looked at him as his zippered it up. He stood there in his uniform, skin showing.

"I don't want your jacket" I tell him. "Too bad, you're cold. Just wear it until we get home" He put his arm around me and pulled me away. "Don't natsu I-" He interrupted me " I don't want to fight today luce" And with that said. I stayed quiet. He let go of me and walked beside me. We both stayed silent, in the station, on the train, and even on the rest of the way home.

Once we stopped at my door I took off his jacket and turned around to give it to him and thank him.

He was already gone.

I looked around for him. But he wasn't anywhere to be seen. I held his jacket, the smell of his cologne on him filled my nose. I smiled and grabbed my keys and went inside. I put the jacket beside my bed, ready for him in the morning. I'll thank him and give it to him tomorrow. I have a feeling he'll come again like usual.

…

 **Natsu pov**

I shivered under the cold as I went home. The cold finally got to me. But I could handle it. It'd be okay anyway. I was only a few steps away from home anyway, I could endure it. My jacket went to a good cause anyway, as long as she wasn't cold.

I spent my evening reading. I was into books now more than ever. They always seemed to fascinate me. Plus it makes me even better in English. I finally fell asleep after finishing the book I was reading.

In the morning I walked to Lucy's house. It was even more colder in the morning. I shivered under the cold. Waiting patiently for her to come out. I heard her open her door and walk out, locking it. She looked at me and smiled. I felt my self falling hard again. "Here's your jacket, thanks for letting me use it." she says as she hands me it. I put it on and smile at her. "No problem" We started walking to school.

She seemed happy today, finally. I thought she'd be mad about yesterday. Trying to pick another fight, but I liked it when she did. She got her problems out in the open, even if it was at me.

 **Lucy pov**

Erza smiled at me, batting her eyelashes trying to persuade me. "No" she smiled even more. "Erza no I don't want to be third wheel, it's you and jellal's anniversary. Not mine" I crossed my arms. "Please lucy? It's important for me" I shook my head no again. "Yeah because he's your boyfriend. Not mine. I'm not exactly important in this situation anyway". She grabbed my hands. "Please?" erza batted her eyelashes even more. Pouting her lip. "If I can bring someone" She smiled and nodded, "so it'll be a double date?" I shrugged my shoulders.

"I guess so"

"Thanks lucy, you're the best" Erza said before she got up and walked away. Digging in her pocket for her phone, to tell jellal the news. I sighed and sat back in my chair. Oh shit. Who am I bringing? I didn't think about this… I don't wanna bring sting. He already has a girlfriend, she might get the wrong idea..

Natsu.

"Natsu" he turned around in his chair. "What?" I breathed out. "Do me a favour…please?" he nodded without hesitation. "Can you come with me to dinner with erza and jellal? I don't want to be third wheel. They said it was okay" He smirked at me. "Are you asking me out Lucy Heartfilia?" I blushed slightly. "No. I just don't want to take sting with me" He smiled "Sure…" he trailed on.

"Fine, I'll go by my self"

"Luce I'm kidding!"

I took one last look in the mirror. I looked at my black dress, it was below the knee and it was tight. But comfy. I curled my hair and even put make up on. I hope natsu actually comes. If not I'll kill him.

I walked to the door and grabbed my coat. I checked my phone before I left, no messages. I grabbed my shoes and put them on. I heard someone knock on the door. I got up and opened it. I stood there in shock. Natsu stood there, smirking and me with his elbow on the side of the door. He looked down at me.

His hair was gelled up, and he wore a black tuxedo without the bow. I stood in awe. It made his jawline even more chiseled than before. He kept staring at me too. "Shall we go?" He asked me and offered me his arm. "I thought you wouldn't come" I held on to his arm, again I could smell his cologne. "Of course not, after all you're all dressed up. I could never miss such an opportunity" I punched him slightly in the side. I felt my neck going red.

"I ordered a taxi by the way, it should be up the street" He pointed. There stood a yellow taxi, it was parked. Still running. Once we got there he opened the door for me, I sat down. I felt anxious and nervous now. Seeing him like that, I never did before. And that made me even more nervous. I'm lucky this is a double date.

"Why the hell is he here?" erza asks me. She frowned staring at natsu. "Well you're the one who said I could bring someone" Jellal put a hand on erza's shoulder, making her sigh. "Yeah you're right.." She turned around with jellal with her. We all started walking to the restaurant. I felt natsu's hand on my back. I went red again. I slapped his hand away. He laughed and shoved his hand in his pocket. I felt even more nervous than before.

"That was amazing" I stretch my arms out. Full. It was a quick meal. Dinner and home really. We had strawberry cheesecake of course, erza's favourite. "Happy anniversary" jellal says to erza. Leaning in for a kiss. They started making out, I felt uncomfortable now. "Ew" Natsu said staring at them. "Why are we even here" I say. They finally stopped, looking annoyed at the both of us. "Grow up both of you" Erza stomped away, embarrassed. I laughed.

Finally we parted our ways. The other two took a cab, natsu wanted me and him to walk the rest of the way. "Thanks for dinner!" I yell at them before they shut the door and drive away. I wave at them until they disappear in the distance.

We started walking home. "That brought up memories" Natsu yawned. "Back when we used to hang out, I remember that time at that arcade. We pigged out on pizza and versed on pacman" I smiled thinking about it. "To be honest lucy, I wasn't there for lissana" I looked at him. "I over heard you and erza talking. So I came. I lied about meeting her" He kept looking forward. "Really?" I ask him. He nodded.

"You sucked by the way" He scoffed at me. "What do you mean?!" I laughed. So did he. I wiped the tear from my eye.

And just like that my heart dropped. I felt my stomach rising up, dancing. I felt fear again. Like I was still stuck in that dark small room. My eyes laid on her, Lissana. She stood there at a cafe, outside shivering. I stopped, unable to move. "Luce what's wrong-" He stopped and looked at her too. His fist tightened, I could almost hear him. But by now I was zoned out. My vision was all on her, so were my ears.

She turned to us. I felt my heart dropping even more. My stomach started moving and twisting.

"Natsu?" she called out.

I felt like fainting again

…

I'm so sorry, this could've been up earlier. But lazy me forgot to and now it's 1 am. -.- oh well it's up.

Please review and enjoy!


	19. Emotions

**Lissana pov**

I stared at the two people in front of me. I recognised natsu. Pink hair. But beside him stood a pretty girl in a black dress. I frowned at the both of them. "Natsu?" he tightened his hands. I looked at the girl, she was a ghostly pale and her eyes seemed dark. I smirked once I realised who it was.

Lucy fucking Heartfilia.

"Blondie" I say, expecting her to flinch or something. But she smiled, at me. What the-. "Lissana" she kept smiling at me, but her eyes were still dark and lifeless. I looked behind her, it was only her and natsu. Good. I could hurt her. Make her hurt, maybe make her cry even. I needed my frustration out.

"So you still a slut these days?" I say to her. "Isn't that your job? Wouldn't want to make you broke" again she smiled. It pissed me off, how could she be so smug. After what she did to me. That bitch..

"You bitch think you're the shit don't you" I was annoyed now. And pissed, she keeps smiling at me. "You still fucking piss me off" Lucy crossed her arms, still having that smug smile.

Who the hell does she think she is?!

 **Lucy pov**

I stared at her, I kept smiling at her. And I could tell she was pissed now. "You're still that fucking dumb ass blonde" she says to me. I keep my smile. "You're still a whore" Is all I say. She's clutching her fists, tighter and tighter. "Stop fucking pissing me off" she spat at me. "Then you should've stayed away" she was angry now.

"You fucking piece of shit!"

"It's your fault I left! I was bullied! i'm a victim! Did you even know how embarrassing that was for me? To endure it? I was practically chased away thanks to you" She yelled at me. "Victim? Please don't make me laugh." you could almost see the steam coming out of her ears. "You took my one friend away!" she pointed at natsu. Natsu just made a disgusted look.

"I had no friends thanks to you! You ruined my life! Destroyed everything I had. I was a victim.. No.. I am a victim. Thanks to you." she stood there silent. "Besides, you had all the guys didn't you?" I say without control. And she gets even more mad.

"YOU FUCKING SPOILED BRAT"

"HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT."

"YOU'RE SO WORTHLESS. DON'T YOU REALISE THAT?!"

I held my breath.

"YOU STILL FUCKING DISGUST ME"

I clenched my fists.

"I BET YOUR FRIENDS DON'T EVEN GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU"

I breathed out.

"I BET YOUR PARENTS DON'T EITHER, ESPECIALLY YOUR FILTHY RICH DAD-"

My fist collided with her face. She went flying backwards and hit the ground hard. She winced in pain and grabbed the side of her face in which I punched. I looked down at her and walked towards her.

"You bitch" she hissed at me. Clutching her cheek. "Thats a lie" I say to her. "Poor lissana. A 'victim'. Had to face bullying all because of me. Well I wasn't the one who ruined someone's life, destroyed her pride, courage, everything. Even her smile. I wasn't the one who beat down a girl enough to make her bleed.. internally. I wasn't the one who took all her friends from her. I'm not a low life. I'm not you." I turned around and looked at natsu once I was done.

"Lets go" I pulled on his arm. And ran. I wanted to be away from her as much as possible. He ran faster than me. So he was the one pulling now. I ran as fast as I could. I just wanted to get away.

But..I felt…different. After that, after I punched her. I had to restrain my self though. I wanted to punch her so many times she'd look different, but I didn't. Same with the words. I still had a million things to say. But I bit my tongue, so I wouldn't say a million words.

He took me to my apartment. Once we stopped we both were out of breath. He kneeled down and looked up. Smiling. I did too. Eventually we both started laughing. Out of breath. We laughed uncontrollably. We probably look like maniacs. But I didn't care. It felt good to laugh. I guess natsu did too since he didn't stop either.

Once we did stop. We breathed heavily again. I propped my self on my front door. He stood up and walked up to me. I could see the sweat dripping down the sides of his head. Running a hand through his hair. He smiled at me, almost proudly.

"Great punch"

"Thanks, tae kwon do"

He laughed a bit. So did I. I felt a weight on my shoulders getting lifted off. And I felt even greater than before. "See? I told you. You were strong" I smiled at him. He looked down at me, still having that stupid smile on his face. He leaned in a bit. I could smell the sweat on him, mixed with his cologne. He leaned even closer. I felt my back against the door. He put his arms beside my head.

"Natsu?.." I whisper.

 **Natsu pov**

I stared at her. Her lips. I felt my self leaning in even closer. I shouldn't. But I do. Her brown eyes seemed even more beautiful this close up. She looked at me innocently. "Natsu?…" She whispers. I lean even closer to her, trapping her.

I kiss her. I feel my lips collide with hers. I kiss her deeply, and passionately. Like the world was going to end. She started kissing me back. I tasted her strawberry lipgloss. I leaned in even more. She was the first to pull away. We both gasped for air. I put my forehead against hers. I smiled at her, she smiled back. The taste of her lips was still in my mouth.

I kissed her again. Even more deeper and feirce.

And with that the night ended.

…

 **Lucy pov**

I woke up. I stretched my arms and sat up. I scanned the room. My eyes burning from the light. I rubbed them and got up.

The memories of last night all came back flooding in. I remember lissana, I punched her. Good. I wished for that for so long. I stopped in my tracks once I remembered when I got home.

Natsu kissed me. He kissed me, fierce like a flame almost.

Shit. I shouldn't have done that. He shouldn't have done that. We shouldn't have done that. I put a hand on my lips. A smile soon formed on them. I felt my self getting even happier.

I'm happy. After all. I liked him before, and it isn't my fault. He kissed me. Me.

What should I do? I.. still don't think I could forgive him.. Or do I?

What do I do now?

 **Natsu pov**

I smiled walking down the street. Skipping almost. I kissed Lucy freaking Heartfilia. The girl I had a crush on for how long? It made me happy. I just hope she's happy about it. I breathed in the cold air, waiting patiently.

She walked out and locked her door. She didn't glance at me or look at me. She walked away, I followed beside her. I waited for her to say something. But she didn't say anything.

The entire time we didn't say anything. I didn't want to say anything either. So I stayed quiet.

I asked Lucy to come to the side of the school, the usual meeting place for us. I sat on the ground with my back against the wall. She came and stood there, quiet and looking at the ground. I got up quickly "luce" I call out to her. She looked up at me, I smiled at her. But she looked down again.

"Natsu, I-I've been.. meaning to talk to you. About last night.." She looked down even more. I stayed silent listening to her. "I...I.." She kept stuttering. "What is it?" I ask her, and she gets frustrated. "I.. just.. Ugh!" She looked up at me, I froze once I seen the look in her eyes.

"Natsu.. the kiss.. was a mistake"

She looked at me, staring into my eyes. "I.. I'm just not ready to..forgive you yet" I stared down at the ground. Why did I kiss her? I knew it was a stupid idea. "How am I supposed to forgive you?" she asks me. "You still didn't give me a reason to forgive you.. you promised me you would.. didn't you?"

"Yes Lucy I said I would.. but still.. was it a mistake?"

"I don't know.. I'm just.. confused, angry, and upset. I'm still iffy about lissana yet. I'm just.. I have a lot going on okay? You, lissana, erza's been on my ass about us. She's still worried"

She sighed, so did I. I ran my hand through my hair. "So..what.. that's it? What about us lucy? Are we supposed to end everything right here right now?" I wanted to say more. But I knew I shouldn't. "I didn't say that! I told you I-I'm scared, upset. Confused. It's just too much. Plus you stole my first kiss." She covered her mouth after she said the last part.

"I stole your first kiss?" she kept covering her mouth. She removed her hands "Yes natsu.. you did. Why do you think I had someone else?" Her face was red, she was blushing. "No.. But still.. your first kiss?" She nodded. "Don't make fun of me" she looked away from me. I smiled at her. I walked up to her, and hugged her. Tightly. "Natsu?" she says into my jacket. I hold her in my arms close.

"I get it. If you need some space, just tell me." I say into her ear. "I'm still trying to keep my promise too." She buried her face into my chest a bit. "And don't call your first kiss a mistake" I whisper into her ear. I let go of her. And her face is redder than a tomato. "Still natsu.." She trailed on.

"Please don't make it harder for me. Please?" she asked me. I nod in reply. "Of course" She turned on her heel and walked away. I stood there, waiting for her to officially be gone. Once she got inside. I sighed and sat on the ground again.

What could I possibly do to make her forgive me?

…

 **Lucy pov**

I sat in class. It's been two days since the kiss. I texted natsu the night after it that I did need some space. To think at least. To think things over.

 _ **"I told you, i'm here for you. If you need space, I'll give you space.**_

 _ **But if you need anything I still live down the street"**_

I read the text message again. I shut off my phone and shoved it into my pocket. I haven't heard of him or seen him since. I guess he really did mean to give me space. I sighed and leaned back a bit in my chair.

 _"And don't call your first kiss a mistake"_

I felt those words ringing in my ears. I sighed again. I really did need some space, I just.. What about lissana now? I still fucking wanna beat the shit out out of her, but what would that solve? "Hey lu-chan" I hear levy say. I turn and look at her. She smiled at me, gajeel stood there looking down at me. I looked down at the desk again. "You okay?" she asks me. I smile and nod at her, trying to ignore gajeel.

Gajeel was levy's boyfriend. I don't know how long they've been together. But still. It sort of sucked, I'm happy for her and all. But still.. He was one of the few who hung around lissana. I'm scared since I don't know if they still do or not.

"Yeah i'm fine.. I'm just tired that's all. I didn't get much sleep" she frowned at me "are you sure? I mean you keep telling me it's nothing.. did you want to tell me something or is it-" I cut her off. "I'll tell you this weekend, come over to my place" I look at gajeel "Alone" I state. He grumbled and looked away from my eyes.

"S-sure" the bell rang, they waved and walked away. I got up and went to my locker. And headed for my next class.

I sat in my room. I had my eyes closed and leaned against the bed.

 _"I BET YOUR FRIENDS DON'T EVEN GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU"_

I bet your friends don't give two shits about you. I opened my eyes again, I yawned and got up from the floor. I walked into the living room and laid down on my couch. Maybe a nap would help.. I have been tired.

I closed my eyes and tried going to sleep. I startled when I heard someone knock on the door. "I guess not" I mumbled and staggered to the front door. Half expecting it to be natsu saying he was bored and wanting to check up on me.

Erza stood there, by her self. She smiled at me. "Erza?" I tell her to come in. "What brings you here?" I ask her as she steps inside. "You. You're making me worry. So I came to check up on you" I groaned. "Erza I'm fine, I'm not a little girl. I can take care of my self" She sat on the couch and patted the seat next to her. I staggered to the couch next.

"So what's going on lucy" She asks me. I sigh and look at the coffee table. "I always had a knack for knowing something's not right, so tell me" I sighed and looked down at my lap and fumbled with my fingers. "I.. seen lissana the other night" She already had her hands balled into fists, mad. "When? That was the night of me and jellals-". "Anniversary.. yeah.." She breathed out and sat closer to me.

"It was after you and jellal left. She was in front of this cafe. We argued" I look at her. "What did she say?" she asks me.

 _"YOU FUCKING SPOILED BRAT"_

 _"HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT."_

 _"YOU'RE SO WORTHLESS. DON'T YOU REALISE THAT?!"_

"Lots. But I took care of it" I put my head back. "Took care of it?" I could feel her eyes on me, ears perked and ready to listen. "I punched her" I tell her straight forward. "Did you send her to the ground" I smiled at her. "That's the Lucy I know" she gave me that signature warm smile. "I feel so much better now, after doing that" I smile.

"I still want to kill her though"

"Go right ahead"

She laughed, I did too. I wiped a tear from my eye. It goes quiet for a short moment "It.. isn't that.. is it" I shake my head no. "It sort of begins.. after we ran.. me and natsu" her eyes went big. "We.. kissed" I say quietly and slowly. I flinch, expecting her to yell and scream and go after natsu. But she doesn't. "I knew this would happen" she breathed out. "Did he do anything else?" she questions me.

"No erza! God.." I felt my ears go red. "Please erza, don't do anything to him." I beg her. "I promise" I look down at my lap. "I told him I need some space though.. I told him I still can't forgive him" I could hear her breathing. "Good, because I would be needing space if I were you too" she puts a hand on my shoulder. "I'm confused though.. do I forgive him? Do I not?" I ask her. But she stays quiet, her hand still on my shoulder.

"It's all up to you, if you want to. Go ahead and If you don't, then don't. It all depends on you" I sigh deeply. "I don't know if I should though. I mean I like him and all. But I know that isn't a reason to forgive him, so what reason should I give him?" this time she sighs. "Just use this time now and think about it. Because I know even if I tell you an answer you wouldn't even listen to me" I look up at her and she gives me a reassuring smile.

After she left, I thought to my self. Endlessly. I turned onto my back and closed my eyes.

I fell asleep, thinking about him.

…

I'm getting so much done :). But anyways here it is.

Please review and enjoy!


	20. Decisions

**Lucy pov**

I sat in my room hugging the pillow. Decisions, decisions, decisions. I'm having a hard time thinking, sleeping, deciding. It's all to confusing and stressful. The worst of it is I haven't spoken or seen natsu in a week. A long week of battling with my self. A lot of loneliness as well.

Levy and erza sort of backed away once I told them what was happening, which is good. I don't want them involved and have them worry over me.

I feel hopeless really. It's either, forgive natsu or forget natsu. I feel like if I forgive natsu I'll only end up getting hurt again. And to forget him will hurt me even more. How can I forget someone who was a big deal of my life? Not to mention he was my first kiss.

I laid down and put the pillow beside me. I stared up at the ceiling. I'm so sick of this. How much can I endure this time?

I've been thinking about lissana as well. And that thinking probably got me even more scared of her. I'm glad I punched her, but then again if I see her again she'll do worse to me. Worse than the time she kicked me repeatedly in the stomach. Almost killing me. That's what got me afraid. It made a lump in my throat.

I can't deal with anything right now. I feel so vulnerable. I feel weak. I feel useless.

I've been skipping school as well. I plan on going tomorrow though. Just to catch up on whatever I missed, and I can imagine a shit load of stuff.

I sighed. I just feel like crying my eyes out and curling up into a ball. I feel so sensitive.

I just want this.. to end.

…

 **Natsu pov**

I sighed as I stared at my phone. "No new messages" I grumbled and shoved it back into my pocket. I'm starting to get worried now, about luce. I haven't heard of her in awhile. She hasn't come to school. And erza and levy don't know what's going on with her, surprisingly. I would go see her but I told her I'd respect her privacy. I don't want to barge into her space. She said she needed some.

But still, who knows if she's still alive. I'm scared of something happening like last time.

 _I came over to lucy's house. Her dad finally approved of me coming over. I felt excited actually. I grinned as I walked towards the back of the garden to where she said to meet her._

 _Once I got there, I looked at the size of the area. It was huge. You'd think people lived here. I kicked at the grass waiting for her._

 _"Maybe I'll.. explore until she comes back" I started walking around. I was curious about this place._

 _I seen this huge white gazebo in the back. I started walking my way there._

 _I started to hear crying. Weeping. I stopped and listened for a second. Gasping was head as well. "Luce?" I called out and started walking faster._

 _There she stood in a light purple dress, her hair in curls with a bow in the back even. She was crying and holding her chest staring at the gazebo. Gasping for air almost. She started to hyperventilate as she fell to her knees._

 _"Luce!" I ran towards her. I came behind her. She keeled over gasping, tears fell onto the grass. "Luce what's wrong?!" I started to panic. She turned and grabbed me. Her arms wrapping around me. I stared down at her._

 _"N.. Nat..Na.. Natsu.." she barely got out. I grabbed onto her and held her. "Shh" I said calmly as held her. "Calm down luce" I told her. She buried her face in my shirt._

 _After a good 20 minutes she calmed down. But she didn't dare look up. "Natsu?" she said sounding muffled by my shirt. "What is it?" I asked her. "Take me away from here" was all she told me._

 _I got up and tried blocking the gazebo from her view. Once she stood up I grabbed my sweater and put it over her head. She covered her self in it. After that I guided her inside, she didn't take it off until we got inside._

 _"Sorry for that.. attack back there" she frowned and looked down. "I.. get them from time to time" She sighed. "How come you got one back there?" I asked her. "Remember…how I told you I can't really go some places around here? Because of.. my.. mom?" She looked at me. I nodded._

 _"That gazebo was her favourite place" she had tears in the corners of her eyes. "I thought.. maybe..maybe this time.. I.. can go there again" taking a deep breath she stared at the ground._

 _"Thank you natsu.." she looked up at me. I flashed a grin at her making her frown fade away._

 _"Anything for you luce"_

I sighed. That was when we were 10. But I'm scared it might happen again. It wasn't good last time.

…

I sat in my room, headphones plugged in. I cracked my back and laid back on the bed.

Luce.. I hope you're okay.

I sighed and closed my eyes. It's been a boring week without her. It was always more fun when we were together. I couldn't help but think about the last night we were together. Walking back from the restaurant, eating together with jellal and erza like when we were younger. Running away from that cafe lissana was at. Laughing together with her, like no care in the world.

Kissing her…

I blushed at the thought. I kissed lucy heartfilia. I let that run through my head. I smiled.

I yawned tiredly. Without knowing I shut my eyes and fell asleep, music still on.

 **Lucy pov**

The next day I eventually went to school. I didn't miss anything surprisingly. All I missed was a history quiz and math review. The other stuff was pretty easy. I could probably finish it by tomorrow.

But I still have that lonely feeling, even if I'm around a crowd of people. I didn't bother talking to levy in class either. I don't want her asking me a millions questions each minute. And erza I don't think was here, which was a bummer. Even though I probably wouldn't talk to her either.

The bell rang. Ending class and meaning the start of lunch. Everyone got up in a fast motion heading for the exit. Once I got up and out of the classroom I walked down the hallway, wandering. In a daze almost. Like I couldn't snap out of it. I wouldn't bother snapping out of it even if I could. I just..didn't care.

Once I realised where I was going, I didn't bother stopping. People blankly stared at me as I passed them. It made me feel weird. But I continued to ignore them.

The roof top felt breezy. It felt nice on my skin actually. I took a deep breath. I scanned my area. No one was around. No one to watch me. No one to judge.

I stepped on the edge of the building. I slowly put one foot on the ledge, and then began to put the other one on once I got my balance. Some people walked by, but they didn't notice me. And they were all heading inside so the number of people were starting to decrease. I stared at my footing. Once step is all it takes. I could end it here, right then and now.

Should I? I mean…no one's going to miss me. I'm just a burden to my friends anyway. They'll be glad.. right? I wouldn't have to make others worry about me no more. I felt a lump in my throat starting to form. I swallowed it and closed my eyes, taking deep breaths.

The fall was far enough to kill me, it an instant. No pain. Just a swift death.

I felt dizzy looking at the ground, my vision started to blur. I stood still. Not daring to breath. Not daring to move.

I think I'll do it.

"Luce?"

…

I decided to re-write this chapter. Sorry if it seems depressing right now, happy times will come :). The next chapter should be up soon though.

In the mean time leave me a review ;)


	21. Fragile

**Also before you start, I would suggest reading the chapter before this. It's re-written so it could fit where the story is going right now.**

 **If you had read it please continue :)**

 **Natsu pov**

Lunch time. Finally, class was starting to get boring with the dull conversation over who was the most important president in history. Stupid conversations.

I'll probably head up to the roof for lunch again. I usually go up there with gray but he was gone with his girlfriend to eat some where, probably a cheap fast food place. I sighed as I headed to my locker to put my stuff away. Once I did, I started to make my way up to the roof top.

Levy walked up to me, panicked almost. "Natsu?" she asked me "Did you see lu anywhere?" I shook my head no. She sighed. "She was here earlier, I swear. I'm starting to worry about her now." she bit her fingernails. "I'll keep an eye out" I winked at her before walking away. She started to walk away as well.

I wonder if she did come... Maybe. Even if she is here I can't see her. So what's the point trying to look for her. But I'll still keep an eye out for her, for levy.

I walked up the stairs towards the roof top. I pushed it open only to reveal lucy standing on the ledge. Eyes closed and still.

I felt my stomach turning.

"Luce?"

.

 _"Hey luce?"_

 _"What is it natsu?"_

 _"We're..best friends right?"_

 _She smiled at natsu. It filled his heart with warmth. "Of course natsu" she smiled and went back to drawing on the paper with him. Natsu grinned happily and continued as well._

 _._

 _"Natsu does really care about you lucy. For awhile, I haven't seen him this happy" erza smiled. Lucy looked towards natsu, who was play fighting with jellal. Who didn't even bother to try. "That's.. great" she smiled and blushed. Lucy tried hiding it from her, but erza could already tell she was._

 _._

 _"Where's natsu?" Erza asked lucy. Lucy shrugged. "I don't know, maybe he's with lissana again" lucy sighed disappointedly. "He hasn't been hanging out with us in awhile actually.." erza stopped once she noticed lucy was quiet. Her head was hanging low. "Oh really?" lucy said trying not to sound upset. "Well… that's his friend too.. He can visit her all he wants"_

 _Lucy looked down even more. Her hair covered her face. "Okay.." erza said quietly._

 _._

 _Lucy felt her self breaking down more and more. The tars started to flow, endlessly. She hugged her self and keeled over. She couldn't believe natsu.. how could he call lissana a friend? When she's just a controlling…_

 _Lucy cried even harder. She was betrayed, all for a mistake she didn't do. She trusted him with all her heart. He knew how sensitive she was, how vulnerable she is. Why would he do this? Just.. why?_

 _Lucy knew she couldn't beat lissana at whatever her game is._

 _Lucy was losing._

 _._

 _"Gray?" lucy stood there in front of the dark haired male. She felt scared. She hasn't spoken to him since.. natsu left. "Lucy" he said. "I.. came to tell you.. sorry." he looked down. "W-what?" lucy stuttered. "I'm sorry about the.. the bag.. and egg-" he stopped and clenched his fists. Lucy stared at him. "You.." she kept staring him down. "Thank you gray"_

 _Gray looked up in surprise. "You.. you were the first one to ever apologize to me". She didn't smile though. "I'm not going to forgive you that easily though" she said quietly._

 _The two were close when they were younger. Almost like natsu and lucy. But.. they separated once natsu and lucy ended everything. "I'm so sorry lucy.." he felt guilt again. "I'm so sorry I didn't do anything..I'm sorry for everything.." he felt like crying. He hurt his friend, something he vowed he wouldn't ever dare doing. But he hurt her, badly._

 _"I'm sorry!" he shouted before falling to his knees. Lucy just looked down at him. Her eyes dim. She got on her knees. She put a hand on his head. "Don't.. gray" she whispered. He started to cry even harder._

 _"I'm so sorry I hurt you" he barely got out clearly._

 _"Gray.."_

 _"I don't want your forgiveness lucy, but just know I'm sorry… okay?"_

 _"Okay"_

 _._

 _Lucy was now in hell. Her nightmares, what seemed to be dreams at first. Were now coming to life. It scared the absolute shit out of her. She couldn't sleep, but she knew she'd have to some time._

 _It was school. That was the main problem. What was behind her darkest fears._

 _She has to leave that hell once and for all._

 _._

 _Life's been pretty fair to lucy now, ever since she left that hell. Now it was just the three of them, lucy, erza, and jellal. Lucy couldn't help but feel happier. She was even starting to make new friends. And she no longer had that fear of everyone she passed in the hall ways._

 _For awhile she felt like happiness was actually real._

 _._

 _"He's been coming to the hospital.. I keep telling him to leave" erza looked at lucy. Lucy eyes were dim. There was no more shine or sparkle in her eyes anymore. "Good.. I.. don't want to.. see him." lucy kept looking down. Erza put her hand on her hand. Lucy just looked at her and smiled. But erza could only feel pity._

 _._

 _Lucy felt.. excited. Levy kept talking about highschool which made lucy even more anticipated. Now she couldn't wait for highschool. And the good thing about it was that she'll be living alone, for once. The solitude and being away from the house might actually giver her some peace._

 _Maybe now she can be happy_

 _._

 _"YOU FUCKING SPOILED BRAT"_

 _"HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT."_

 _"YOU'RE SO WORTHLESS. DON'T YOU REALISE THAT?!"_

 _"YOU STILL FUCKING DISGUST ME"_

 _"I BET YOUR FRIENDS DON'T EVEN GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU"_

 _"I BET YOUR PARENTS DON'T EITHER, ESPECIALLY YOUR FILTHY RICH DAD-"_

 _"Natsu.. the kiss.. was a mistake"_

 _"And don't call your first kiss a mistake"_

.

 **Natsu pov**

"Luce what are you doing?" I tried to stay calm. I walked towards her but she put a hand up telling me to stop. What was she thinking?!

"I'm sick of this natsu" she told me. "I feel like there isn't any happiness for me.. I'm forever sad and depressed. No matter what I do can't-" she stopped. "Look natsu just leave. You don't want to see this" she raised her hands as if she was going to jump.

"No I'm not leaving!" I yelled. "Why are you doing this lucy?!" I panicked. I felt panicked. I could feel my heart going faster and my gut doing an awful dance.

"Natsu just stop it!" she yelled. "You wouldn't get how I feel! You don't know how it feels to be depressed 24/7. Battling with your own mind! You don't know what it feels like to be hurt, betrayed, all from the people you love! I can't stand not being able to smile brightly! I'm so sick of being looked at as if I'm some kind of a bug! I can't stand it anymore! I told you I'm sick of this! I can't handle anything anymore! I feel like I'm dying anyway so why not just do it?!"

"Do you think suicide is the answer?" she trembled, her legs shook in fear. "Do you think there isn't any help for this?! I know I won't ever feel the way you feel! But I know what pain feels like!" I felt the lump in my throat trying to form.

Lucy stood there, trying not to cry. Her feet shuffled. She looked away from me and looked down towards the ground. My gut twisting even harder. I felt my heart speeding from just looking at her, fearing she might jump. "Lucy please" I pleaded. "Don't do this" I slowly started to walk towards her. "Natsu" she barely got out as she looked at me. She turned away from me and looked up at the sky.

 **Lucy pov**

As I stared into the sky. I couldn't help but reflect on my past. Over everything I went through. How much pain I went through. Is suicide the answer? I breathed in and out slowly.

Natsu pov

"Natsu?"

I looked up at her, scared so much I was shaking. "Catch me" she said weakly as she fell back slowly away from the ledge. I ran towards her, I caught her before she hit the ground.

She immediately started to cry once I had her in my arms. I felt relieved, she was in my arms safe and secure. "Natsu I'm.. sorry" she croaked. She sat up and hugged me. "Luce it's okay.." I tell her in her ear. I feel my self trying to cry. I try to swallow it down. But the tears end up coming anyway. And I let them flow.

There we were crying, holding on to each other for dear life. I held lucy so tight. I felt like she still might fall.

 **Lucy pov**

I feel weak, I feel awful. I just about attempted suicide. At school even. What am I doing?! What the fuck was I thinking?! I feel so pissed at my self, and worried about my self. It was all going so fast I couldn't process it. I was just on a ledge, trying to end my life. Now I'm… crying in the arms of natsu. I let him hug me, smother me, and hold me tight. Because honestly, I felt so safe.

"Lucy.. why would?-" he stopped and sobbed. He held me even tighter. I started to cry even harder.

…

I didn't bother to stop crying. I just couldn't process anything in my mind. I was so blew away at my self.

"Why?" natsu asked me. He let go and wiped his nose. I looked down at my self. "I-" I sighed and looked up fast. "I told you didn't I? I.. feel weak. I'm… just.. so….. tired"I broke down again. He put a hand on my face. "Lucy.. I-I know you're going through a lot. I know I've hurt you, I know you've been hurt by a lot of people. But I told you too didn't I? There is help. Just tell someone about this." He wiped a tear from my face.

"But natsu I.. I just.. can't!" I held his hand. "I can't get rid of this feeling of.. despair and grief."

"I thought you had a plan luce.." he trailed on "I'll help you with your plan" his eyes didn't look away from me. "I'll make sure you find true happiness in your life"

"Natsu.." I teared up again. I hugged him. "Look I told you before, I don't care if you don't forgive me. I just want you to be happy. You can kick, scream, punch me, whatever. I just want you to be happy." He held me.

I kept crying. I couldn't stop the tears. I couldn't stop anything really. I breathed in.

 _"Thank you"_

…

Alright. Here it is. Look I bet some people are going to be upset with this chapter, where it's heading and such. But that's fine. It's my story. And if you're worried about where it is heading, don't worry. Like I said before happy times will come.

I also wanted to say is, if you are contemplating suicide or tried to attempt sucide, or anything in related to that. I just wanted to tell you it's okay to feel that way. You probably went through a lot in your life if you feel like that. Just know that there is happiness in life. There is something to live for. You just have to find it. And if you find it cherish it. It might even be a simple thing, but don't worry about it. Also, you are loved. And like natsu said in this chapter, there is help for this. Keep fighting if you are contemplating. I applaud to you, for battling with your own mind every single day. Just keep fighting. Life will get better. Trust me.

I feel kind of iffy writing a story like this, because I don't know what it feels like to be suicidal. But I just wanted to try it for a change I guess.

Leave a lovely review :)


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